Kayleigh Puget's So-Called Life

SGL IS CLOSED.

2011-05-21T12:11:00.000-07:00

I just don't have the time or the patience to continue with a blog that hardly anybody reads. Obviously, I will keep the existing posts public so that if anyone stumbles upon this by accident, they might have a little read, and decide to come and find me elsewhere (unlikely). I'm also keeping it so I can peruse it when I need reminding of how amusing and good life can be. If you REALLY miss me, here are some links:

My Twitter -- I post on there a lot, and I am quite hilarious on there, not gonna lie. If you want quick updates on my life (I can't see why, but there you go), or want to message me, this is your best bet.

My gig blog -- Keep an eye on this if you enjoy my post-gig rambles and hilarious mishaps. Not updated often as I don't get to go to tonnes of gigs like some lucky people.

My Tumblr -- Look at this if you want snippets from my life, pictures of me, etc. This has, appallingly, become my 'main blog' now; I have been sucked in by how addictive it is. Every day I asked myself why I'm on that site, and every day I can't think of a reason, but still. That is where I am mostly now.

My DailyBooth -- If you're a perv and want to see new photos of me D:

You can easily get hold of me through any of these :) I may be gone from SGL, but I am not gone from tha Interwebz.

And it's not like this will come as any real loss to anybody :')

Gig Blog!

2011-02-26T11:47:00.000-08:00

Yes, it's all very exciting. I decided that my gig blogs are so massive that they need a whole blog all to themselves. So from now on, all my gig posts will be here:

http://www.kayleighlikesgigs.blogspot.com/

I think it's much better that they have their own place to be. Go take a look; I just spent bloody hours sorting it all out. And I have not slept all night; delirium sets in, and I'm going to hockey tonight!! I love this :)

This is what I did today...

2011-02-26T03:49:00.000-08:00

Killjoy photoshoot for Lozz. L--R: Liam (obviously not my brother XD), Sheree, moi, Kym and Tom. Lovely jubbly!

Country Bumpkin

2011-02-23T15:17:00.000-08:00

I went out for lunch with Mutti at The Savoy in town. It used to be a cinema, so is decorated like one with film posters and for some reason bookshelves. I think it's adorable, even though it's not the most reputable place in town. As I was munching on cheesy chips and quaffing Monster, all I could hear was three old men chatting in really annoyingly broad Wiltshire accents. As if I need reminding that I'm in country-bumpkin land and not a vibrant, fantastical city. I felt like I was in Hobbiton rather than Gondor, excuse the geeky analogy. I need to get away from here.

In other news Mutti got me a cog necklace and a new sketchbook.
And I have a cup of watermelon slices, eeeeeee!!

-- Kayleigh

N64

2011-02-22T18:37:00.000-08:00

Squeee! I am going on a daring mission up to the attic to obtain my N64 cause I want it back so I can play it and keep it working until I go to y00n33. This means I will have to get the courage to jump into the attic, where the ghost in my house hangs out, in order to get my hands on the console. Wish me luck!!

Wild

2011-02-20T16:09:00.000-08:00

I am the most outrageous teenager in the world. Last night, I was up at 1am watching Coronation Street with my drunk mother, drinking Liam's Captain Morgan's dark rum and feeling a bit tipsy myself. Mutti kept making up songs about all the characters, and I nearly killed myself laughing. We ate loads of McCoys as well, and do you know what? I had so much fun.

And this morning I had fun as well. I played The Michael Jackson Experience with Ryan on his new Wii; it's basically where you can dance along to MJ songs. Fucking excellent, and it was great thank you very much. So yeah, apart from the fact I haven't gone anywhere or seen anyone sane today, I'm happy.

-- Kayleigh

Half Termio!

2011-02-18T12:30:00.000-08:00

Thank goodness! Today is the last day of half term, so I have a week off now. This makes me incredibly happy! What made it better was that it's Maggie's birthday today, so she brought in a banana cake for us all to share. Oh my goodness me, it was absolutely delizioso! That made me excited. I hope the rest of the day is amusing, because I don't want my excellent mood to be ruined.

Also, Mo and I were listening to Adam and the Ants.
I fucking love Adam and the Ants.

-- Kayleigh

Media Lols

2011-02-15T16:32:00.000-08:00

Two conversations that happened.....
Mo: Well stuff like Big Brother and Skins are post-watershed--
Me: Post-MORTEM more like.

*talking about Laurence René constantly mentioning the stupid gold-paint theme for their April/May tour*
Me: Gawd stop going on about it--
Mo: You should go and just sing 'Gold' by Spandau Ballet--
Me: No, I think I'll just punch Laurence and tell him to shush.
Mo: ...Whilst singing 'Gold' by Spandau Ballet?

Oh haha :') This blog is shit lately; I have nothing good to talk about lately :(

h8 v-day

2011-02-14T20:49:00.000-08:00

The only good things about today were the fact that I had Insanely Happy Fat Man as a bus driver on the way home, and this:Laurence deciding to be my Valentine for the day and making this cute pic for me :)

OVERHEARD #15

2011-02-11T15:36:00.000-08:00

-- Type in jazz cover of System of a Down
-- Walk me, you homo!
-- If you cry like a bitch, I'm gonna laugh.
-- 'I hate it when you wind me up Jamie.' 'What did you say, you love it when I wind you up?'
-- 'Are you gonna leave college when EMA stops?' 'No, I'm gonna shoot Nick Clegg'
-- I think my mum is having an affair with Freddy Mercury.
-- She headbutted a pigeon.
-- I didn't know Borat was your uncle
-- Suck my exhaust!!
-- I'm on the next rascal bus now, mateycrunch!
-- 'Did you just call me a beast?' 'Yes.'
-- Why are you downloading Jesus?
-- 'Nandos tomorrow night!' 'Oh you little cunt!'
-- *whilst on the phone* Hello? Hello? Fuck off!!
-- I really wanna run someone over...
-- Just because Kayleigh's got a cock, doesn't mean everyone else has!
-- *on a moving train* It sounds like Heather Mills running, doesn't it?

Good Day

2011-02-11T10:51:00.000-08:00

Today's been good already because of these reasons:
a) I have a large caramel hot chocolate sitting on the desk next to me.
b) A random stranger walked up to me before this lesson and said, "Nice hair!"
c) Maggie flustered in a bit late just now, and said she'd gone to the wrong room. I called her a penis. I got away with it. I thought she was going to die laughing ("I've never been called a PENIS before!!").

Ohh, it has been funny :') And on Tuesday I gave Mo an analogy of this caramel chocolate that I haven't written anywhere yet. I said, "This is like an orgasm in a cup.. Which isn't a bad analogy cause chocolate and orgasms release endorphins!" Mo decided the explanation killed the analogy. I disagree.

-- Kayleigh

EDIT: And I said to Maggie, "Yeah we got all our tings" and Maggie actually used the word 'tings'. OH MY GOD, MY SIDES.

Happy Birthday James

2011-02-09T09:58:00.000-08:00

He would've been 30 today. RIP angel, foREVer.

Through my sadness, I just almost died laughing. Jen was talking about a test we have next week, and said, "Next lesson will be doing group revision for the test." Lozz said, "Cancelled??" and I nearly died, it was so good. The fact that what Jen said sounded NOTHING LIKE 'cancelled' made it even more delicious!

MURDERDOLLS

2011-02-07T20:54:00.000-08:00

When we got to the Academy, we found Spider and KeeGle quite quickly and the five of us casually queue-cut to get into the venue quicker. We didn't quite get to the front for the support act, and it took a LOT of argy-bargy behaviour to get to the barrier. We managed in the end though, as we always do cause we are well-learned and skilled in this kind of thing. So we were at the front for most of Murderdolls, which is all I wanted really.
The first support was a London-based band called The Defiled -- they are absolutely AMAZING and you should all check them out! They're incredible live as well, which is a bonus as they're a gorgeous bunch of gothy punky mentalists. Stitch, the lead singer, has a beautiful singing voice and a riveting stage presence. The keyboardist, AVD, is actually insane; he kept throwing his keyboard around and I feared for my life a few times. He appears later in this blog, where more madness occurs. He's actually one of my favourite people now, cause he was half hilarious and half terrifying.
The second support was Black Veil Brides -- you may have heard of them cause of their pretty-boy, Internet scenekid fame lead singer, Andy Six. Honestly, I was not impressed with their 'talent' or their attitude towards the show and the fans. They were mediocre as fuck live, just using shit theatrics (and I mean SHIT) and pretty make-up, hair and costumes to cover up the fact that their music and their stage presence was a load of shit. Andy Twatface Six didn't even make the effort to even look at the audience or interact with them; he just gave off an aura of 'I'm better than you and you mean nothing to me' to everyone. Loads of BVB fans were making hearts and shouting at him, but he didn't even acknowledge any of them. He obviously thought he was doing us all a big favour by being there. Only the people that literally went straight outside after the show got to meet BVB cause they didn't either bother to hang out for a while and talk to fans. I have lost ALL respect for them, and I feel sorry for the multitude of BVB fans that came to the show, some of whom only made the effort for BVB. God, no wonder Joey Jordison hates them.
Murderdolls, however, were ABSOLUTELY ASTOUNDING. Always chatting to the audience, and acknowledging everyone (including the people up in the top shelf). They put so much energy and effort into their performance and got the whole crowd moving and screaming the words to songs. You could tell that they were really enjoying themselves as well. Joey Jordison was right in front of where Lozz, Maggs and I had shoved to the barrier, and I admit I had a little cry cause I was seeing someone I've idolised for years in the flesh. He was adorable too, with an almost permanent grin on his face, waving at everyone and flailing across the stage with unbounded energy. Wednesday seemed to be drawn to our side of the stage too (Lozz blamed my bandboy magnetism XD), and I blew a kiss at Joey with no real hope; imagine how amazing it was when he blew one back, and laughed at my weak-kneed reaction. God I love him; I also love what we called his Petulant Child Look, when he was stood stiffly, glaring at the top shelf who weren't moving with a pout on his face. He looked like he'd been denied sweeties or something XD
The encore call for Murderdolls actually sounded like the end of the world, and looked like Hell. There were red lights that were shimmering in the heat-haze from the sweating audience, and everyone was soaked with sweat and the water that security kept throwing out at us. It started with some scattered shouting for separate members of the band, then a chant started: "Murderdolls! Murderdolls! Murderdolls!" and so on. Then people started clapping and stamping and it sounded amazing; I felt like the apocalypse was bearing down on me and it was the most charged atmosphere ever! Ofcourse, Lozz and I indulged in our favourite encore practice; singing 'Numb/Encore' by Linkin Park & Jay-Z for a few verses. The encore was the most amazing one I've ever seen; they did an amazing blend of two of my favourite 'Dolls songs -- I Take Drugs and Dead In Hollywood. The crowd went wild!
Afterwards, Joey collected up his remaining picks and hopped down into the space between the stage and the barrier to hand them to people. Loads of grebs started battering me at this point, trying to get past and steal a pick. I just looked at Joey and mouthed, "Please?" He put a pick in my hand and closed it with his hand, before giving my hand a little squeeze and letting go. I hugged him, and stroked his hair back from his face to look at him properly; he was absolutely stunning, and had a little smile playing on his lips for a second before becoming serious and moving on to hand Maggs a pick too! He didn't say a word for the whole time, and it just made it all the more magical and surreal! JOEY EFFING JORDISON GUYS!!

Although, because it was such an intense show and a mental atmosphere (I've never experienced anything like it before), I sustained a lot of injuries! For starters, I was bruised all over from the battering I took at the barrier, I still have a sore throat now, two days later.. I got elbowed in the back of the head really hard by some fat greb fuck, and saw stars for ten minutes; luckily though the AMAZING security guy saw this happen and threatened the fat fuck. I liked this. I got accidentally punched in the mouth twice, and kicked in the face when people were taken over the barrier.. You get the idea. I hurt all over, but I loved every second of it!!

We hung out outside for ages, and got obsessed with singing the live recording of the Killswitch Engage cover of 'Holy Diver' by Dio. We got to meet 4/5 of The Defiled, and I'll list each encounter to break up this long blog:
>> Stitch: We established the Cunt Club after deciding we're both horrible bastards; he was such a laugh, and shared his beer with me and everyone in the vicinity which was amusing. My kleptomaniac tendencies reared their ugly heads at this point, and I managed to steal a stud from his jacket. Unfortunately I didn't get his Misfits patch that was stitched haphazardly on his jeans.
>> Luke: An absolute sweetheart; he let me steal his Graveyard Promotions badge from his jacket when I eyed his attire hungrily for something to steal. I told him he was my favourite after he said something very suggestive to me. Ohh, I love band boys that flirt!!
>> AVD: I tried to steal the bandana tied to his jeans and he told me he'd punch me if I did; he's so mad I actually believed him, but I replied coolly, "I'd love to see that. I'm having a hug." before hugging him. He said, "I'm charging for this by the way.. Ten.. Twenty.. Thirty.. Forty.." then he started gyrating his hips against me in a rather crude way, so I danced with him for a while; it was fun! In my picture with him, we are striking a rather raunchy pose, which made me hysterical, and he kept making demonic noises when having his pictures with Maggs and Lozz. Tears of laughter flowed.
>> Vincent: A New York bassist. He was brilliant as he constantly looks terrified. I didn't manage to steal from him either; I didn't have the heart cause he was so cold. I hugged him to warm him up and he liked this. And he refused to accompany Stitch to the pub cause he was 'talking to these guys' (i.e. Maggs, Lozz and I!) I absolutely loved him to pieces.

We also met a lovely Welsh boy called Jarrad, who made an innuendo out of just about everything I said. He was a sweetheart though, and I'm still chatting to him, so that's nice. A new fwend!! We met Jack from Murderdolls, and I exclaimed, "C'MERE SEXAY!!" before pulling him slightly over the fence in a rather enthusiastic hug. His reaction was, "WOAH, HEL-LO!!" and a laugh. I loved him, he was a lovely, lovely guy. And we also met Roman, who dished out picks to Lozz and I, before turning to Maggs and saying, "I have no picks, but I have this if you want it." It was a really shiny pound coin. This was so amusing that Maggs had to take it XD I had to kiss Roman on the face for being so generous! Unfortunaltey we didn't get to properly meet Joey or Wednesday, which is understandable. They're the only original members left in Murderdolls and would've been SLAUGHTERED if they came outside.

Back at the hotel, we stayed up til past 3am, being insane (the pics show the disgusting debauchery that went on) and went for a stroll with Monster to get chips from the kebab shop. The only people out were drunks and insomniacs, and the chips were AMAZING, but I felt ill all night cause I'd been living off Monster all day. I got a couple of hours of kip and in the morning we made up The Wrath Of Sleeping Corey Taylor, and Maggs said, "All jokes aside about him being a genius cause he cut his hair off.." which made me laugh a lot, as it reminded me of Lozz calling Corey a GENIUS. We also made up the whiny 'WEDNESDAYYYY.' which I now use when I'm stuck in a rut.

Click here for a public Facebook album containing the amazing pics from the entire trip. On Saturday we trailed around and looked in shops and had a laugh, not to mention getting a box of Krispy Kremes, omfg yes. AMAAAAZING etc. I'm happy even though I'm suddenly really ill -_-' TYPICAL.

-- Kayleigh

Pre Gig Insanity

2011-02-07T12:55:00.000-08:00

So, you can probably imagine the shambles I was in on Friday when I was in college. I was so hyperactive that I just couldn't keep my mind on one thing. Geoggers was especially funny as Mark was in an excellent mood and was in his element cause we were talking about Barbie (cause the company that made up Barbie uses globalisation to exploit cheap labour in less-developed countries of corpse!) and Corey said, "Jack fancies Barbie." and Mark said, "Yeah, but if she was real, she'd be a cracker!" Stacey turned to me with a thunderstruck look on her face and said, "Mark's hitting on Barbie!!" I laughed about this for the whole lesson; it got quite painful after a while. And Mark told Corey to 'shut up, cause you're getting on my tits now'. Yes, this is the teacher. I call it responsibility.

After college, Lozz, Maggs and I got the train to BRISTOL TO SEE MURDERDOLLS!!! We laughed all the way to Bristol on the train, much to the entertainment of the people standing with us (yep, we were all standing cause the train was PACKED). We couldn't find the exact location of our hotel cause there were many stupid bendy roads, so we asked a bloke who worked in a cool shop. He was lush and had a half English, half Canadian accent; it nearly killed me. And he was FIT which helped. He drew us a crude map to explain where to go from the shop and was very helpful. I loved him completely. When we'd thanked him and gone on our way, we trolloped off, remembering the directions he told us. To make sure we were still on the right track, I stopped a random boy in glasses to ask if I was going the right way; he pulled his hood down to speak to me and oh my God he looked just like Shane from Fearless Vampire Killers. Honest as I'm sitting here, he could've been Shane's twin. It was eerie!

So eventually, we got to the hotel, where we hurriedly got ready as we were running a bit late. We gothed it up and slagged it up, and were soon on our way to the o2 Academy to finally see the fantastic Murderdolls!! Onwards to the next post for the next instalment; the actual gig and the ridiculous night we had afterwards!!

-- Kayleigh

Sneak Peek

2011-02-05T21:17:00.000-08:00

There's a little look at my Goth Slag outfit from last night. You're gonna have to wait til Monday for the blog and all of the pictures for two reasons:
a) Because my camera has finally died, after surviving everything up til now :( So about 98% of the pictures are on Lozz's camera and I can't get them til Monday and
b) I honestly am so tired right now, running on no sleep and Krispy Kreme doughnuts, and I have to catch with LOADS of college work tomorrow :)

You can wait. All I'm saying is that..
I HAVE HUGGED JOEY JORDISON.

-- Kayleigh

Oh lol.

2011-02-03T10:36:00.000-08:00

I hurt from laughing. I'm in Psychology now, but in Geoggers Stacey and I spent the lesson complaining, looking at pictures of food and comparing pictures of Jigsaw from SAW with Dave. They're separated at birth, I swear down. It was all very funny, and I still managed to get three pages of work done.

Just now, Kieran called me harsh when I said "See you later, you slaaaag." to Lozz, so I pretended to punch him in the face. Touché Satan.

Post-Exam

2011-02-02T09:32:00.000-08:00

Had my last exam yesterday; it was Geoggers, so obviously it was rubbish. Had a nice long bitch with Stacey afterwards though, which always makes me feel better. I haven't had much to talk about, but it's ok cause in TWO DAYS I'm going to see Murderdolls, and the day after, I'm hanging out in Bristol. SooooooOOOOOOooooo there should be plenty of bloggings when I return *holds fist aloft with solemn expression on face*

Meanwhile, I'll just leave you with that 'fit' picture of me that I took yesterday. You love it. You slaaaaaaaaags.

-- Kayleigh

Look What Laurence Sent Me On Tumblr

2011-01-31T08:28:00.000-08:00

Awhhhh, cute or what?? All because I made him a photo of me with one of my FVK biscs on my mouth like so:
What a sweetheart!

I'z

2011-01-29T21:55:00.000-08:00

If you guessed I'm at Lozz's tonight, have ten points. On the bus, there was a man that looked like Robert Downey Jr., with a grey suit jacket, black t-shirt and jeans, with a posh coat and pointy brown shoes. He was chewing a cocktail stick and looked like he was in the Mafia. Corrrr.

Impromptu GOTK Times

2011-01-27T21:23:00.000-08:00

So we just decided, about two hours before they were due in Marlborough, that we'd go and say hi to the Glamour of the Kill boys. Last minute plans occured, and we enlisted KeeGle and Spider to join us. We also found Benji at the acoustic set GOTK were doing in a bar before hanging in the music store, where they were signing shit. We caught the tail-end of their set then trundled over to the music store and waited for a bit while some kids in front of us got all their stuff signed etc. Benji and his mates, and my group of people were all shouting about the guy filming the whole thing and he pointed the camera at us; we all went mental. Ridiculously so. Then I shouted Davey down for a while cause I'd been chatting to him on Twitter since we started doing impromptu plans. He was happy we'd made it and the first thing he asked Lozz and I was, "Will you guys be at Joiners in March?" We assured him we would be, and I gave them a flyer to sign, saying, "Start with Ben then bring it down to Davey; this is for my wank bank." They all laughed and I asked Davey if he still has his black rose. He said he did, and that it was above his bed; Chris chimed in with, "It's in his wank bank." This was most amusing. I hugged Davey and gave him a little kiss saying it was nice to see him; he said it was 'lovely' to see me :D I demanded 'loving' from the rest of the guys; Chris and Mike gave me a big group hug and Chris muttered to Davey as he sat down (I don't think I was supposed to hear), "Does she give head too?" I said, "Did you say something about head cause that can be arranged?" They all laughed then look interested and ecstatic. I enjoyed this. I gave Ben a big hug cause he hadn't managed to get in on the group one, then I had a really attractive photo with them:
I hope you can tell that I was lying. Anyway, I also decided to tear a poster from the window after fluttering my eyelashes at the guys that worked in the store. I charged over to the guys and said, "Sign this cause I'm rock'n'roll enough to have nicked it." Then I asked Davey to write 'blowjob' on it. He did:
We also: told Davey Gina wanted to meet him (he came over to where we were sat in the bar, after the music store fandango, and said, "Hello mummy!"), told Chris he looks like Synyster Gates, eyed Davey's chest tattoos (I pulled his top down a bit so I could see; he was shocked), I stroked his hair for a while (sooo soft!) and let him stroke mine too (biggest privilege ever!!), and I gave them all plenty of loving!

And I kissed Davey's hand like a true gent when he left.
I ruined it somewhat by shouting "DAVEY MAKES ME HARD!" as we left the bar.

-- Kayleigh

P.S. And Davey called me 'a very pretty girl' -- oh my life O___O

LOL

2011-01-27T14:14:00.000-08:00

This lesson is just amazing, I LOVE IT. I just told Kieran I love his shoes; he said, "Thank you very much." Corr, corr. And half the class has untied their shoelaces :) This class is never dull; I've nearly died laughing anyway :))

...I just instructed Lozz on how to tie her laces (for work, seriously -- Martha is a ledge) and finished it with, "..AND DOUBLE-KNOT THAT BITCH."

Lozz Is A Genius

2011-01-27T09:27:00.000-08:00

These are the looks she tried on me last night. I love the bottom one best, cause it's so dark and theatrical, but I'm loving the Ke$ha-inspired glitter lips in the first picture :))

-- Kayleigh

Mo's Note To Me

2011-01-25T17:25:00.000-08:00

Frack Off

2011-01-25T11:56:00.000-08:00

People in college are so bloody rude!! I was sitting in the library, and a bunch of foreign fuckers (let's not beat about the bush here, cause it's nearly always the foreign ones that are so rude) were just loitering behind me, reading everything on my screen and huffing and puffing. One of them said pointedly, "WE NEED A TABLE." and I just stopped typing, stretched and yawned for ages, and deliberately took ages to vacate the table.

Seriously, I bloody hate rudeness. I was there first, they can wait their damn turn or move the fuck on :)

Also, sorry I've been so tardy with this blog lately, I am a horrid person indeed. But there just hasn't been anything to blog about seeing as I've been spending my life revising for Psychology A2 this Friday. THIS FRIDAY. Owch. But I'm staying at Lozz's tonight as her 'rents are away in Cardiff. Excellent!

-- Kayleigh

College & Red Lippy

2011-01-24T13:49:00.000-08:00

akjnknjdfhkjbfhs

2011-01-22T16:51:00.000-08:00

Ofc Martha's lesson was wonderful on Thursday, and I have a few highlights to write about. Kieran disclosed that he and Sean rap in their spare time, and I laughed at him. He said that they are called MC Tall and MC Just A Little Bit Smaller Than Tall. For GOD sake. He then elaborated, saying, "You know Tinie Tempah? Well, we're Huge But Calm." I ask myself this question every day, but what the hell is wrong with Kieran? He's just INSANE. He also talked about how much he loved Material Girl by Madonna; I rest my bloody case. Keira tried to correct me on something, and I just said, "SUCK IT." -- everyone (including Keira) laughed, and I sat back in my chair, comfortably observing the hilarity I cause people. I managed to remember the name of a theorist who was relevant to what we were talking about (memory n ting if you're interested, which you are), but I couldn't remember what he did so -- when Martha asked "Who was he?" -- I said, "Some.. Asshole." More laughter. More feeling popular. Then we were talking about the case of Clive Wearing, a much-loved topic cause we're all mature and find it hilarious that he had herpes and THAT caused his hippocampus to go haywire. Somehow he had herpes of the brain; I didn't even know that could happen. Kieran asked how he got herpes of the BRAIN, and I said, "Skullfuck!" If you guessed that the class laughed, well done! Ten points! Then all I heard was Keira saying that Clive must have been a man whore, and that finished me off to be fair. I was rolling in the aisles almost permanently after that.

After college on Thursday, I bought myself a lovely new pair of brogues. "Not another pair of shoes, Kayleigh!" I hear you all shout in dismay. Well, yes, another pair of shoes! I needed to have them! I would have died otherwise! :)

I spent today realising that Swindon has fucking no wireless connection. Pisstake :)

-- Kayleigh

Gee thanks

2011-01-21T11:24:00.000-08:00

The only comments I ever get on here is spam. So popular.

Mark Watson Needs To Get In My Life Now.

2011-01-20T01:51:00.000-08:00

Today/tonight was SO EXCITING!! Psychology was good cause we learned about Zimbardo, and I know that study like the back of my hand. I was sooo pleased, and Jen was impressed that I'd managed to remember loads of detail about it (she didn't realise that on Monday I wrote like 11 pages of Psychology revision notes, of which that study was a part), so I felt excellent. My spirits were high despite the fact I was lugging around a huge sum of money (well to me, £400 is a lot to be carrying around in cash, in an envelope, like drug money) and was quite nervous about it. After the lesson, Lozz and I shot off extremely quickly to Comet, where I charmed a cute younger guy while he talked me through the laptop choices in my budget, in his pink shirt and everything. He was very honest and didn't try to sell me anything that I didn't want, and he was very helpful in explaining the laptops to me and everything. Corrr! He was startled when I paid in cash, and I sobbed, "Counting and giving away all this money is cutting my soul." Lozz said, "Kayleigh, you don't have a soul." and I said, in true Cecil-off-SAW-IV style, "I don't have a fucking soul!!!" -- unfortunately, our cute guy seemed to recognise the quote. This was lovely. He got some girl to re-count the money and I said, "Is it cause you're shit at counting money?" He played along which was adorable. And the guy that brought my laptop(!!!!!!) to me had nice red and black stars tattooed on his inner wrist. Eeeeeep!! As if I didn't love my life enough already, I got a BRIGHT PINK HENRY HOLLAND LAPTOP BAG, JUST LIKE I WANTED. SUCK ON MY CAPITALISED STATEMENTS, YOU FIENDS!! Yes, I'm excited, you have no right to judge me! Oh, and there will be GORGEOUS photos of my laptop, when I can be bothered. In the meantime, you can put up with the first ever inbuilt-webcam-off-my-laptop photo of beautiful (LOL) me.

So I was like.. Almost imploding from all the fun and excitement, and THEN we went to Bristol, to the Hippodrome, to see the filming of a programme on Dave called 'Dave's One Night Stand'; our one was with the comedian Mark Watson (who is HOT in real life!!!), with Alex Horne, who was absolutely hysterical and kept saying he was from Swindon -- I hope this is true, because he was an amusing gentleman. Also on the bill was Andi Osho, an insane black London girl who cracked me up with her Nigerian and African-American accents and made the whole room absolutely hysterical with her stories (she also had an amazing pair of heels on, which made it so much better) and James Acaster, who did the longest and most accurate mime of a bloke creeping around a room in which two people are trying to get down; THAT was funny as it reminded me of me, every time I come home drunk :)
Mark was absolutely amazing. He reminded me so much of me and my friends because of how dry he is, and because he always shouts things out at inappropriate times in public places. Sound familiar to anyone? Hmmm? Also, Gina yelled, "GET YOUR COCK OUT!!" after some rather childish penis-related humour, and the fit boy and his fit dad near us (I asked the son to sort out his hoodie string in the queue, so gained some rapport -- result!) nearly died laughing. And the hot guy sat in our row loved it when I said I'd punch him in the ass if he disturbed us again, and tripped and fell against me as he shuffled past at the end. How I enjoyed this. Corrrrpus callosum!!

Alex Horne's amazing song feat. Justin Timberlake, Massive Man and Massive Man B, "I like the muffin.. But I don't like you!", Funky Knitwear Man, TOM, the warmup guy being as funny as the acts (if not, funnier), volumised cheering, re-takes -- "I must've cycled on!", tiny red opera glasses, the girl in charge of Mark losing her temper with him when he lost the ability to concentrate on what he was doing, "Where you from? Bath? Oh! Oh! I FUCKED YOUR MUM!!", Andi's rant on men having to build Ikea furniture, boo-ing at people who do things wrong, Mark screaming at the audience without his microphone and saying "THIS IS MUCH MORE ALARMING!!", cheering when the microphone was brought onstage and booing when it went offstage, "SQUATTING!?!!?!", the fat man running for a train, "Have you ever used your ventriloquism at an inappropriate time?" "TELL THEM WHAT YOU DID!!" "It was at her dad's funeral..", laughing at Alex saying his grandma was beaten to death by his grandad, and a whole host of other amazing things. Seriously, it was so funny; I just wish that I could remember every second of it cause obviously all the best parts will be edited out!!

Afterwards, we drank Monster and inhaled three huge Dave balloons worth of helium. Ohhhh :') Thanks to Lozz, Gina, Ellie, the hot guys of the night, the warmup guy, Mark Watson, Alex Horne, Andi Osho and James Acaster, I've had an amazing night!!

Also, as it's past midnight and today was technically yesterday (still follow??)..
HAPPY BIRTHDAY MUTTI!!

-- Kayleigh

P.S. I wish I was funny enough to do stand-up :(

P.P.S. The delightful Trudi has also cut my hair; I look less like an overgrown angler fish now.

Tuesday is coming-- did you bring your coat?

2011-01-20T01:50:00.000-08:00

So, on Tuesday I took a huge book entitled 'The Second World War -- A Military History' to college; honestly, my shoulder was falling to pieces by halfway through the day, but it's a bloody interesting read. It's not my book, it's Liam's. His fault for leaving it lying around (in his wardrobe where I was returning his Scary Movie box set :D) I enjoy this book immensely, and got many approving looks from the offensively old people on my bus. And on the 13, there was a wild-eyed punk man. He was like.. A million, and had lost his hair on the top but not the sides, and had spiked his remaining hair OUTWARDS. He had insane, bright blue eyes and was wearing a Killing Joke t-shirt, with a leather jacket, black skinnies and Dr Martens. He was insane, but so cool all at once!

In Psychology, Kieran and Sean came in late, so I said, "SORT IT OUT. GAWD." and then added, "AND SMILE." Cause Kieran's decided (over Facebook) that my name is Angry and I retaliated with, "Shut it, miseryguts! You had a right face on you today!" So I won again. No one can beat me/self-absorption
Jen got so frustrated with me chattering on that she just said, "KAYLEIGH!" I said, "JENNIFER!" and everyone, including Jen, laughed. It was another I'm-so-popular moment, I'm afraid.

When we went to town, we sloped into Trinket to see if Yankee Cap Guy was working. Oh my. YES, he was. We chatted to him for far too long, with increasing flirtatiousness (not a word?? ohwellz) and increasingly dodgy comments, until Lozz decided to gloss over the fact we'd been chatting there for ages by BUYING ME A NEW PLUG. Quids frackin IN!! It's rainbow, and I will get a picture when my life sorts out :))

And in Media, Mo reduced me to hysterics by calling Simon Cowell 'Simon Trowel'. OH MY LIFE! :')

After college, my beautiful and amazing Nanny Jean gave me £400 for my laptop. I love her sfm, she's just the best. She was the best before (as Kelsey knows veeery well!), but now she's just.. I love her. And Vati and I went over to Becky's so that Vati could measure for the puppy's cage so she stops chewing the house. As usual, Jess The Over-Excited Labrador was insanely happy to see us as in her mind (and in reality), this equation happens: Kayleigh + Kayleigh's Vati Markus = PLAYYYY!! So yeah.. We had fun playing with Jess for ages, and she managed to nibble my LIP. This was hysterical. I love that puppy so much, I need to get a picture of her. I say puppy, she's getting well big now. Awhhh.

Oh and also, Vati got me KFC. 'Nuff said.

-- Kayleigh

Hi

2011-01-17T08:57:00.000-08:00

I haven't blogged on here in ages. This is because there really hasn't been anything to blog about. I'm going laptop hunting on Wednesday so hopefully *fingers crossed* I'll find something in my price range, cause my lovely, beautiful nan said to just call her when I find one that I want. So I'ma go to Comet, talk to some geeks, and hopefully have a gorgeous laptop that I can lug around in a Henry Holland laptop case *hoping*.

Oh, and that's not the only exciting thing that's happening on Wednesday; in the evening I'm going to Bristol with Lozz, Kevin and Gina to watch a TV show called 'Dave's One Night Stand', which is basically a show featuring comedians. The headliner for ours is Mark Watson, so I'm pretty excited about this! And it'll be the first TV show I've ever watched live! So woooo!

My life is pretty good, even if I am constantly revising for A2 Psych *misery*

-- Kayleigh

All Lozz Does In Photography

2011-01-12T11:39:00.000-08:00

In other news, I'm still at death's door, which is bloody fantastic. Not. However, I think the Psychology exam this morning went rather well, but I don't want to jinx myself. So I'll just say that I'm happy with it, and keep your fingers crossed for me. I was surrounded by people I lurrrrve too though, which always puts me at ease in exams. Lozz was two places behind me, Freya was literally next to me on my left side, Kym was three places away to my right, and LucyFag was two places in front of me. This made me extremely happy, as did the presence of Buff Kieran, whom I'm friends with on Facebook. You heard. Fucking succeed.

Also, Lozz reminded me that I didn't blog about the fact we got our photo taken with the team when we went to hockey, as a birthday treat for her. That was bloody terrifying, actually, although we did love it when we heard one of the guys say, "Pretend you're on a catwalk, laydeez." Ohhhh. And I turned around and was face-to-chest with the lovely Bullas; he offered a single, knee-melting smile and I died. And went to heaven. Yep.

-- Kayleigh

Rednecks With Good Hair

2011-01-10T11:58:00.000-08:00

Lee and I have decided we're getting a redneck ranch in America, and we will sit in our rocking chairs with our shotguns shouting at people to bring us hairspray and drinking illegal hooch til the end of time. I like the sound of that life about now.

Birthday Hockey

2011-01-09T15:45:00.000-08:00

FINALLY went to a hockey game last night, for Lozz's birthday! I hadn't been all season -- how did that happen? D: I've just been so poor/busy, but I've finally seen it and omg the euphoria was excellent. I forgot how high I can get off a hockey game! We were playing Manchester, who are an amazing team, but our team played absolutely beautifully, bless them, and we only lost by like a hair! It was sooo frustrating, cause we went into overtime then penalty sudden deaths (TWO of them!! Almost unheard of!!) Honestly, we were all there, spitting nails and pulling chunks of our hair out from all the tension!! It was sooo good!! And some lovely hot players were on the ice (e.g. Bullas -- my favourite!, Melichar, Sharp and Neil!). Nice Bum Steve was watching the game, and Ollie came to see me in the first interlude, which was lovely of him. Walking out in the freezing bloody cold just to come and say hi to me. I love him muchly!!

Lozz and I both won a puck from the ice! Honestly, I've never seen so many pucks fly off the ice in one game! Lozz got hers first, and I got mine cause this cute little boy came over and offered the puck to me -- cutest little thing in the world!! So we were both pretty chuffed about that. We were also chuffed when we got eyed with interest by Melichar in the pub afterwards. However, we didn't win the shirt off a players' back which was Bullas that night. I was particularly gutted, as he is infact, my favourite hockey player on the planet!!

It was such a good night, and I hope I made it more fun for Lozz and she had a good birthday!

-- Kayleigh

New Things

2011-01-06T13:35:00.000-08:00

Yesterday I got me some lovely boots. The website makes them look black in the picture, but they're actually brown:And today this came through the post for me:That is a little love letter from Kier, yes.

I am in a good mood, even if I am at death's door.

Yes Iwan!!

2011-01-04T21:09:00.000-08:00

Iwan Rheon (e.g. Simon off Misfits/amazing singer/fabulous actor/beautiful Welsh boy) sent me a kiss on Facebook today. I don't mean to sound big-headed, but my life is clearly better than your life.

Happy New Year Brenda!

2011-01-02T21:12:00.000-08:00

Once again, it's a new year! And a happy new year to you all! I know this is a bit belated, but I've been gaziboed so shush your mush, I'm here now. Wine, Malibu, vodka, Jack Daniels, more wine. Very good, quality time with the fam. Click here for the horrific pictures!

Love Never Dies

2010-12-30T20:46:00.000-08:00

So, yesterday Mutti and I scuttled to London to see the sardine. I fell in love with the Tube all over again when we went on it. And when we found the Strand Palace, the doorman (who was wearing a TOP HAT) doffed his hat and said, "Good afternoon ladies!" when he opened the door for us -- I felt ever so posh! Put it this way, our hotel was opposite the Savoy (i.e. the poshest hotel in London, and possibly in England) -- yo yo, we iz high class!

We soon found familiar ground (a Wetherspoons) and were sitting on a table next to some gorgeous Italian boys; here's something to give you an image -- one looked like Bean Jolliffe and had really long eyelashes. Yeah. Think about it. Mutti, showing all the class she always does, said, "Shall I just get fish and shits?" HUFF. And she called a man 'Mafia' cause he was massive and Italian-looking. I personally was going to call him Rotti Largo, but found 'Mafia' much more hilarious.

Our hotel room was bloody beautiful -- there are pictures of it, don't panic. Sooo plush and again, we felt posh as fook. We watched Flushed Away and Mary Poppins whilst drinking tea and eating biscuits.

The Adelphi Theatre is absolutely lovely, by the way. The performance of Love Never Dies was absolutely astounding, breathtaking, beautiful, perfect and every other amazing adjective. Honestly, the acting, singing and dancing was impeccable. It was weird, mad, dark, aesthetically stunning, glittery, colourful with a twist of Steampunk thrown in, and I adored every second of it. The Phantom was played by the same man as the one I saw in Phantom of the Opera back in 2008! His voice honestly makes me well up every time he sings, it's THAT good. Not to mention he's bloody gorgeous. Want proof?

Yeah, that's what I thought. The little kid that played Gustave was absolutely adorable; his little singing voice was fabulous and he got a huge round of applause at the end, bless his face. They all got a standing ovation, which they bloody well deserved and I bought myself a keyring; it's shaped like a wax seal and has 'Amore Numquam Moritur' written on it. Corrrr.

Today, we just sauntered around London, pretending to be tourists. And the FUNNIEST thing happened on the train; a black Chav got stuck in the toilets and ended up kicking the fucking door down. This was excellent cause I first saw his hand clawing out of a minute gap he'd made between the door and the side. Then all I saw was his Chavvy feet kicking the door out. The conductor saw him and he emerged shouting, "FOCKIN TOILETZ!! I GOT STUCK IN DER MAN!!" -- Mutti and I were literally crying with laughter.

Click here to see the pictures from LANDAN!! And now I can't wait until tomorrow, when we go to Marilyn's for a New Years piss-up.

-- Kayleigh

Where Am I Going Tomorrow?

2010-12-28T22:24:00.000-08:00

I'm going back to London, my spiritual home, to see the sardine (courtesy of my wonderful brother Liam, and fantastic stepdad Martin -- how's this for a Crimble present!)! I'm not really seeing the sardine, our dear Queenie does not hold my interest this time. This time, I am going to the West End to the THEATRE DARLING. To see the follow-up to Phantom of the Opera.. It's called Love Never Dies. It's going to be uh-mazing, and we're staying in this place:
It's called the Strand PALACE. And it has a concierge.
How cultured I am.

"I love you, Kayleigh!"

2010-12-28T21:09:00.000-08:00

Lozz and I drank cocktails for Jimmy in Sir Dan's, and got way too tipsy to be acceptable at two in the afternoon. I bought a lovely soap from Lush as well; I went in there saying, "I want to get a cinnamon-scented thing!" Not only did I find a cinnamon-scented one, it also has a MOUSTACHE on it. I was delighted. And it was half price. Wins all 'round. I got angry and threatened to 'go Columbine' when I found out nowhere in my shitty town has the series one and two box set of Misfits. Arrrrrgh, anger! Lozz took her shoes off on the way to Outlet cause they were hurting her XD Then promptly bought a pair of Converse for twenty quid in Footlocker. I was squeaking my shoes really loud, and someone else started doing it. Lozz said, "Kayleigh, you've started a trend!" and the Chindie guy that had started copying me said, "I love you, Kayleigh!" We also ate a whole KFC popcorn bucket (6 pieces of original chicken, two large boxes of popcorn chicken and four portions of chips) between us. Disgusting piglets we are. While we were eating, three Chavs went past. One was in an electric wheelchair, one was in a normal wheelchair and one was on crutches. None were disabled. This was hilarious. Another funny Chav moment was when we were walking back towards town and some Chav called us slags XD This was especially delicious as I was in a t-shirt and leggings and Lozz was in a t-shirt and jeans. What a twat.

-- Kayleigh

1 Year Today

2010-12-28T10:11:00.000-08:00

The world lost a beautiful and talented human being. One year today, I've carried around a weight in my heart for him. One year today, one of my favourite bands changed forever. One year today, James 'Reverend Tholomew Plague' Owen Sullivan left us to be an angel.

This post is in memorium for what he gave me, and the world, and what he taught everyone -- to be yourself, and to live your life to the fullest. Cause you never know which day will be your last. Everyone have a drink to Jimmy today, and think of him.

RIP James, foREVer. xx

Christmas Pics

2010-12-27T12:43:00.000-08:00

I adore this outfit:
Just for Mallory, my lovely Christmas tree:

MY Christmas bauble!:

Our Australian kanga decoration!:
Me on Christmas morning, with some of my presents!:

The debris in the living room:

My BEAUTIFUL Jack Skellington throw!:

Merry Xmas, Lovers & Loverboys!

2010-12-25T21:39:00.000-08:00

Christmas Eve

2010-12-25T10:54:00.000-08:00

So tonight was fun! The journey to Lozz's house was a real ego booster. At the bus stop, some Chav -- who was blatently smoking a joint -- cast an appraising eye over my outfit and asked if I was cold. I assured him I wasn't and said, "I can smell weed though." -- he gave me an exaggerated wink and asked me if I wanted a drag. I politely declined. And, I managed to get on the bus that stops at the end of Lozz's road by sheer sex appeal. The doors were shut and the driver was about to go, so I stood outside the door in my cute -- and tiny -- outfit and fluttered the eyelashes and put a half-smile on my lips. He grinned and let me in, and smiled at me the whole time I got my ticket. He wasn't bad looking either so I was kind of melting at his smile, and gave him a big grateful smile in return. So I felt very pretty and irresistable XD

We (we being Lozz, Gina, Kevin and I) went round to Stacey's where Christine, Stacey and Brooke already were and it was a really nice evening. We ate Chinese and ice-cream, and played a guess-the-tune game with the KAZOOS(!!) we got out of our crackers. We also played a game where everyone has some letters from the alphabet, and the quizmaster (me) calls out different categories for them to name something from. The best by far were:

Me: Name something that lights up.
Gina: Radioactive.. People.

Me: Name something that's white.
Christine: GHOSTS!

Me: Name something that's black.
Christine: Tinie Tempah!

Me: Name something you have to hold onto to use.
Stacey: COCK!

Me: Name a tool.
Lozz: Black people!

Me: Name something you'd find at a zoo.
Christine: Long.. Snake!

Amongst many, many others. We were honestly crying with laughter, it was so funny. It was nice to just sit around and play stupid games and have a laugh. Lozz and I were wearing Christmas hats; hers was dark red, and mine is silver and shiny. Anyway, that's all I'm writing for now; I'ma go and snuggle up in my new Jack Skellington throw and watch Love Actually!

-- Kayleigh

Lydiard In The Snow

2010-12-23T17:16:00.000-08:00

Me in the snow. Yep, shorts and thin tights. Brrr!

Lydiard House amongst the frosted wilderness:
The ducks, wondering where the water has gone:
The Ice House, looking more like a hobbit hole:
Mutti and I, looking happy:

♥

Really, Caz?

2010-12-21T17:50:00.000-08:00

"I think I just pulled off one of my tastebuds!"

LOL.

Highlights

2010-12-21T12:39:00.000-08:00

Here's a list of good things that have happened since my last blog.....
>> Playing with Lozz's dogs out in the snow in our pyjamas. Bullseye in particular absolutely loves the snow, and he was adorable. I have a few photos and a couple of videos from this, and I will upload them eventually. Y'know.. When I can be arsed.
>> Iwan Rheon fix. We watched the Christmas special of Misfits, and you got to see his bum cause he was all neked and stuff. Corrrrrpus callosum.
>> Making Christmas cards for Mallory and Lana.. You two, I doubt you guys will get your cards before Christmas but better late than never, right?
>> STUDY NIGHT WAS AMAZING. What a geek, eh? No, seriously, it was great. The best bits were when Lozz put Rex on my head while I was working and when she made a neuron out of fizzy strawberry laces and jellybeans. We decided to eat each piece of it, naming each 'part' of the neuron -- funnily enough, this actually helped me to remember what the parts were called. Mad!
>> Yesterday Caz and I went bowling and it was absolutely hilarious (we played pool after and sucked at it XD). They had The Muppets' version of A Christmas Carol on the screens and we were watching the opening credits when a name said Richard Hunt. I walked away to bowl, then it hit me that a shortening of Richard is Dick, ergo.. DICK HUNT. I burst out laughing and stumbled over to Caz; I said, "There was a bloke called Richard Hunt--" and we both said, "YOU CAN SHORTEN IT TO DICK HUNT!!" -- we had to Eiffel Tower, it was the best thing ever! And Caz took a photo of me collapsed on the floor in despair after a particularly rubbish bowl XD

Now, I'm at Caz's house. Last night we went outside and had a really funny five minutes back in the conservatory; we honestly laughed until we couldn't actually breathe. Once again I have amusing pictures and videos. Veeeery amusing, cause it's Caz ;D Right now I'm sitting in an impossible position on her living room floor, in pyjamas and an oversized stripey jumper, and we're making Nigella cookies later. 'Citing!!

-- Kayleigh

Picture Time!

2010-12-18T10:32:00.000-08:00

From BBC Bristol:

Mo molests Bruce Forsyth :O
A little bit of my surroundings:

Gratuitous tit shot to show my visitor sticker (and my Pavi mirror!):

Mo and I on the coach home, in the sunset:

In Psychology.. Lozz's Prick Stick -_-'

My spotty nails, done by Lozz in Psychology:

The remembrance card I wrote for The Rev at the funeral home:

The remembrance tree at the funeral home. Every card that got written on got laminated and hung on the tree as a decoration; I thought this was a beautiful idea:

Lozz's present to me. She wrapped it in caution tape and it took me ages to open it. It was worth it though: Let The Right One In on DVD and a Murderdolls ticket!

And finally, one from today.. Really, England? REALLY!?!

Einstein & Tyres

2010-12-17T16:23:00.000-08:00

Today I saw Einstein running for the bus. Excellent sight. Also, I love it when you see a bike tyre around the base of a lamppost. Cause you just know a Chav spent ages throwing it and trying to get it over the top XD

Also, all the unis I applied to have answered me. I didn't get into Reading or Cardiff, but I have conditional offers from UWE, Brighton and Hertfordshire. I'm feeling Hertfordshire for my choice, Brighton for insurance. Yup.

"I WILL FOCK YOUR CREW UP!!"

2010-12-16T17:21:00.000-08:00

Today has been absolutely hilarious, although my throat is sore from the slanging matches that happened in MARTHA'S LESSON!! More on that in a sec, I need to remember if anything good happened before that lesson.. Oh yeah, Imhotep stood on the table for no reason in Geoggers and got Stacey and I in hysterics for too long. And Stacey gave me a little Christmas card; it was GLITTERY and had a picture of an owl on. I absolutely loved it! I also got a card from Lozz; she'd hand-made it. It's pink and green with a black and pink deathbat pattern on it; I adore it so much!

Martha's lesson though.. It was honestly THE BEST. Lozz and I sprinkled candy canes upon everyone, and everyone loved us for it. Everyone munched down during the revision section of the lesson, and Martha saved her two (cause Lozz and I had to give her one each!) for after the lesson. The revision was alright; spent some serious time chatting to Martha cause I need to nail these exams or I'll die unhappy. Then the lesson took a turn for the worse ;D She divided us into groups, splitting up all the friendships groups and we did a quiz. This was fucking hilarious cause our team just pwned EVERYONE!! We were called 'Yo Mom' and other teams tried to accuse us of cheating just cause we did really well and I shouted, "I WILL FOCK YOUR CREW UP!! WHO WANNIT!! WHO WANNIT!?!!" like Jamal in How High. Every time Martha was like "Alright, marks out of ten!" for each section, Lozz and I would burst into 'Marks Out Of 10' by Dizzee Rascal. Excellent. I got extremely competitive though; it's a running trait in my family, along with cheating and being bad losers. For once, I didn't cheat though; we actually did it off our own knowledge, and felt very smart. We won a selection box at the end, and all picked the sweets we wanted the most. So my prize was a packet of Jelly Tots. BOOYAH!! This made me extremely happy. Life is sweet, even if I did freeze to death on the way home.

-- Kayleigh

P.S. Mutti has The Pogues on repeat downstairs; I love it!

Fatrick Lump Is Skinny!?!

2010-12-16T12:53:00.000-08:00

OVERHEARD #14

2010-12-14T19:33:00.000-08:00

-- I didn't think I could use that in real life!
-- I dressed up as my mum
-- I wanna rob your lemon!
-- *to the tune of 'Hot & Cold' by Katy Perry* You change your mum like a guy changes.. Socks
-- ...Spend half of it on drugs
-- I said I've got hayfever, you SPASTIC!
-- Was it, like, a broken shark?
-- 'What are you?' 'Crack' 'What you on about??' 'Oh, I thought you asked what I'm on!'
-- My feet are really hot -- I feel like I'm on fire!
-- MOPHEAD!
-- Fuck off, Katie, you stupid little slag!
-- 'I accidentally kicked him in the crown jewels so I asked him if he wanted me to rub them better' 'Mate.. Are you a poof?'
-- My mum's like Hitler, seriously!
-- He looks like someone's pummelled the back of his head with a brick.
-- Sarah Jane can't lie, she's got her own programme!!
-- You massive chocolate tea kettle!

It's been a while. What's your favourite one? :)

-- Kayleigh

Sam Fancies Photoshop

2010-12-13T21:23:00.000-08:00

In Media, we were all 'working' on the Macs to sort out what we're doing for our production things. Sam came gliding into the room in a terrifying manner, as he often does, and started going around the room seeing what people were doing. A hasty minimising of Tumblr and Facebook occured on my part, but I needn't have bothered; Sam had become interested in Mo's plan for his vampire movie poster which was lying on the desk. Unfortunately, Mo had decided to label this in a rather yobbish manner, prompting Sam to say "Whose is this old ass vampire?" and because he's a teacher and because he said it in such an expressionless voice, he reduced me to hysterics. I'd already laughed once because of Mo's poster plan; underneath the movie title he'd written 'motherfuckin tagline' as a reminder of the fact he needed a tagline. Maggie came over and looked at the poster, then said, "Motherfuckin tagline? Martyn." and just looked at Mo. Oh, and my life gets funnier X__X Sam was chatting to me about fonts (I'd spent about ten minutes looking at the same fonts on dafont because the other windows in my browser were social networking, and Sam was hovering) and said that I'd have to 'rasterize' fonts on Photoshop in order to use them on any computer. I said, "RASTArise!?!" and he said it's not as interesting as it sounds, and went on to talk me through how to do it. I said, "Ohh, I hate Photoshop Sam, it always takes too long to load!" and he said, "I love Photoshop.. More than anything." so -- when he asked me to type something to demonstrate rasterising, I typed 'Sam Fancies Photoshop.' -- the best part is that he didn't bat an eyelid.
In Psychology, Buff looked absolutely incredible. He was dressed like a reet indie kid but oh my goodness. Unff overload. For no reason, Jason decided to hand out chocolates to us cause this was the last time we'd see him til after the Crimble holidays. I was most pleased, even if I did get a trapped nerve in my SPINE halfway through the lesson D: Actual aggers. We spent the lesson talking about popularity. AWKWARD. I was not popular in school -- infact, people were either scared/slightly wary of me cause I was 'a psycho', or they just ragged me to hell and back because I was 'a Goff' (i.e. alternative -- Chavs are so thick they just class everyone different as a 'frackin Goffick') A-wayyy, after that spewing of venom..
Lozz collapsed to the floor laughing outside my Psychology room; I don't remember why. I think it might've been cause I managed to film Mo going into the girls' toilets to retrieve his scarf that Lozz had thrown in there. A man was trying to get past but Lozz was in the way; I said, "Lozz. There's A MAN there. Move." She jumped to her feet and said, "SORRY. MAN!" I've realised that my laugh has gotten louder and more infectious than before -- I enjoy this immensely.
In Geoggers, as soon as I walked in, Lucia said, "You look really pretty!" and I glowed cause she's absolutely gorgeous. I felt lush for a second, in my cute velvet dress and burgundy tights. Yep, I'm that cool. Dave was talking about how the 2004 Boxing Day tsunami made the day three millionths of a second shorter, and told us a story about a boy in one of his classes that year that came in late and said he'd missed his bus cause his watch was three millionths of a second too slow. Chav Jack said he'd use this excuse from now on, and Dave said it wouldn't work cause there hasn't been a tsunami. Chav Jack said, "Yeah there is, IN COATE WATER." and everyone laughed. Really, Jack? Oh, we had some lols in that lesson, and it was really easy cause we just watched a video of everything being destroyed. Ahhh.

After college, I got the bus to town with Lee; for no reason, he produced a mint from his pocket and said, "I'ma try and give that to the driver; I'll say 'Look, I'm minted'.." I had to punch him, the joke was so awful. Today's been a good day; I feel absolutely fantastic. And later in the evening, I heard Mutti listening to Cat Stevens and singing along, which always puts me in a good mood. Ahh, life is sweet.

-- Kayleigh

"You, with the hat!"

2010-12-10T17:16:00.000-08:00

On the way to the trip today, I called Mo a 'star in a reasonably priced car' cause he brought some excellent snackage with him. Our coach drove past a coach full of old people, so we all started waving. Some of them waved back, some of them didn't. I said, "It's like ooh we're going on a day trip too! ..The only difference is that they're being driven.. to die." and that got a laugh. Unfortunately my humour is dark like that.

So we got to BBC Bristol, and got given blue and white stickers stating that we were visitors, which was all very exciting. We also got a BBC Tours lanyard, AAAAAH!! We all felt vair official at this point. We had a tour around the place with a man known only as 'Dan' -- he was dry, sarcastic and completely insane, with a really infectious chuckle. Scary. But the tour was really good; we got to see the archives, the radio rooms, the news room, the studio, the gallery, the radio play room, and it was all so interesting. I learned a lot today. There was also some funny bits, as follows:
There was a shady character in the news room, known only as Dishevelled Sam. Dan spent the entire tour ripping into Sam, saying he was too scruffy, and telling him to get a haircut/a real job. It was all very funny, and Dishevelled Sam was adorable. It was great to walk around the place cause there were loads of people from the telly news floating about; it's weird to see that these people actually exist and aren't just made for the news XD In one of the radio rooms, Dan explained how the things there worked and said what the broadcaster had to do. He then went on to say that they were given a feed pellet and told 'well done' when they'd done their job, which made me laugh. In the radio play room, he said, "You, with the hat!" at me, and made me walk across part of the floor that was a wood panel to demonstrate the 'walking down corridor' effect it created. And he said that a small box thing with various door ornaments on (for sound effects) was 'Richard Hammond's house'. There was a massive cardboard cutout of Bruce Forsyth in one of the rooms and we had fun with that, and I got nominated (by Mo -_-') to be a newsreader cause Dan decided Mo was the weatherman; I walked up to Mo and punched him, which made Dan laugh explosively so I feared for his health. It was quite cool to stand there with a long thin microphone and read off an autocue! I felt like a real journalist for a second! And Dan told me that I read it really well -- they're so gonna give me a job ;D And Mo's weather report was amazing. I'm lying. Weathermen have to ad lib their entire segment, I learned today, which is quite scary! Mo proved that it's nigh impossible by fucking up completely, so it was referred to as 'Mo's Amazing Weather Report' for the rest of the day. When we were watching the lunchtime news live, it cut to one of the presenters outside a few blocks away and some guy piped up with the priceless gem, "I saw that guy downstairs earlier! He picked his nose!" -- which was HILARIOUS. I can't even remember much, which is annoying cause it was a really funny and interesting day. I'm glad I decided to go in the end, even if I did get up at 6am. SIX. AY. EM D:

-- Kayleigh

P.S. Liam reckons he's taking us to see Harry Potter tonight. Fucking succeed.

P.P.S. Oh and Mo decided that the two groups we were split into earlier were called 'A-Team' and 'Plan B' -- for frack sake.

"Your hair is so cool!"

2010-12-09T17:01:00.000-08:00

Today was alreet. In Geoggers, we were talking about waste disposal and Mark asked where medical waste (bandages, needles, etc) went; obvz we all replied 'INCINERATOR', being vair professional A-Level students. Mark decided to inform us that they also put body parts into the incinerator. I loved this idea and laughed loudly for quite some time before I managed to calm down. At which point, Lucia started me off all over again cause we were talking about how only organic material can be turned to compost, and she said, "Imagine composting your granny or something." Which was amusing. It was also amusing when she, Stacey, Abigail and I had a massive conversation about stomachs rumbling loudly at the wrong times. That was the best conversation I've had all week. And Mark made the mistake of mentioning seagulls that hover round landfill sites to scavenge stuff; Stacey said, "Yeah they get their grotty old beaks stuck in." and I nearly burst my lungs, it was so good.

In my break, I got a smile and a man-nod scenario with Hula Hoops. YESSSSS!! In Martha's Psychology lesson, all we did was make six A3 mind maps of all the psychological approaches. I especially enjoyed this as all of mine were colour coded :D Cause I'm that cool, and I got five out of six of them done -- Martha was most pleased. I love her. There was so much banter in her class too, which made it even better.

As I got off the bus in Wroughton, a schoolboy said, "Your hair is so cool!" I turned sharply and thanked him, disbelieving, and -- as I walked away -- I heard the girl sat with him say, "She always looks so nice!" which means she'd noticed me on the bus before!! Aaaaah!! As Lozz said to me, "You've got a little fanclub going on!" I felt so amazing for a bit, cause schoolkids are the most critical people in the world and the fact they were awestruck by me was an ego boost! :)

-- Kayleigh

I love them!

2010-12-08T16:40:00.000-08:00

Summing Up

2010-12-08T15:05:00.000-08:00

Here's a quick lowdown of the highlights from Monday, Tuesday and today:
On Monday evening, Vati got me a Hello Kitty Christmas calendar cause I guilt-tripped him about the fact I DIDN'T HAVE ONE THIS YEAR D: Score one! And I got sweets, and I'd had a chicken roast dinner with chocolate gateau for pudding. Ohhh, outrage!!

Yesterday, I had the JLS bus driver! Ahh, I love him so much; he is actually goooorgeous and SHOULD BE IN JLS!!!! We had Charlene as a supply in Psychology cause Jen was ill; Charlene was being really horrible to everyone and does not have a sense of humour. So Lozz cracked open a can of Monster while I had a fake coughing fit to cover the sound; we hid it under the table and kept drinking from it when Charlene wasn't looking. I took a huge gulp then stuck my vees up at her. It was exquisite.
In the break, Jordyn made the mistake of ruffling my hair. I ran up behind him as he walked away and jumped onto his back, snarling, "NEVER touch my hair again, GOT IT!?" he tried to escape, but I just strangled him and said, "GOT IT!?" before dropping to my feet. He said, "Alright, got it!" and I said, "Ok? We cool now, gimme a hug!" so we hugged and I messed his hair up completely as revenge. He just sighed and said, "Bitch!" which was most amusing.
In Lozz's Photography class we had a Christmas singalong cause Sam went home ill and there weren't many people in the lesson. 'Merry Christmas Everyone' came on and Lozz sung to the tune, "Snow is falling, all around me, children playing.. Paedophile." and it was hilarious. And my Media lesson was cancelled, yesssss!!

Today, I just had a mock exam in my AS Psychology class, on all the stuff I've learned so far in AS. I think it went ok but I won't get too hopeful cause I don't wanna jinx myself. Also, Young Guns have updated their webstore with their tour merch... GLOVE HEARTBREAK!!!! :'( -- this is a shameless cue for someone to get me these. Or the skeleton king t-shirt in size small... I'm a shameless scav. And proud. I'm also heartbroken over these items, but that's just another reason to be shameless.

-- Kayleigh

AIDEN 2

2010-12-08T14:55:00.000-08:00

Finally, here it is!! As usual, I'll warn you.. It's a long sonofawhore, but bear with me; it is very funny. So the hilarity started in the car, when we tried to force Mo to sit in the baby seat and ate ridiculous snacks and listened to bangout ch00nz all the way to Portsmouth. We got to the venue and um.. Well, we weren't really impressed XD What is it with shoddy venues lately? I need some Joiners back in my life. We got to jump to the front of the queue cause Tom, Kerry and Lauren were already there; a lovely reunion occured at this point -- I absolutely adore those three, our gig buddies, the GOTK kids back together once again! I also got to see Sarah and Sue again!! Much love to them!! AND I met a girl I know from Tumblr, Sophie, and she was frackin amazing too. We were all bewildered when a man rode out of the venue on a bike, and even more bewildered when a guy with the most ridiculous bowl cut sauntered outside. We spent some time shouting, "NICE HAIR." at him and I accidentally on purpose yelled, "JOHNNY ROTTEN!" at a middle-aged bloke with yellow spiky hair. We met a nice boy called Mark, who was from a band called Ivyrise; he charmed us into getting tickets for their show in January, and he had lovely skinny jeans on. He was a very nice young man and Ivyrise's music sounded good from what I heard. I also pulled his labret piercing but that's a different story -- I still can't believe Kerry was shocked about this, she should be used to my awful behaviour by now. Tom decided to sing really loudly and pitch-perfectly, "EVERYBODY DANCE NOW!!!" and everyone in the queue laughed.

So, we got into the venue, where Lozz gleefully pointed out a girl that wouldn't look out of place on Scene Fail. We saw Nick Wiggins wander past, and he looked so small and so skinny that I had to stare at him. Sophie tried to offer me £1 to rugby tackle him to the floor, but I declined as I kind of wanted to see the gig before being thrown out. Five antiqued boys walked past in suits, with lovely hair, and my reaction were: "Ahhhh, cute batties!" and a pause, followed by, "Why are they antiqued though?" After that, they trampled onto the stage and I said, "Oh jeez, it's as if One Direction died." and everyone around me laughed. I soon took back that judgement as they were absolutely AMAZING. If you've guessed from my previous posts that I'm talking about Fearless Vampire Killers, you're very right! Ten points! Drew (the bassist, my favourite) is absolutely mental on stage; he was running around all over the place, slipping over, headbutting the guitarist (Shane) in the ass, crashing his bass into the amp, falling to the floor, etc. He later confided in me that he hadn't worn the right shoes for stage and lifted a foot for me to feel the lack of grip on his soles. Idiot boy :) I shouted "NICE BUM!!" at him at the end of FVK's set; he grinned at me and I said, "Sorry you weren't mean to hear that!" he said, "That's alright!" and Lozz said, "You're in!" Ha. I wish. Kier, one of the singers/guitarists, has some proper fangs going on. I was mesmerised. And Laurence (yep, another Laurence), who is also a singer/guitarist has amazing stage presence, kinda like Gerard Way (Lozz told him this later on and Larry said, "Ohhh he's my hero!" -- attaboy!). He was so enthusiastic with his guitar-playing that his orange pick flew off the stage and landed just in front of the barrier. I launched over the barrier and hung by my legs to grab the pick for Lozz XD I am like Spiderman, don't lie. After FVK's set, '7 Weeks' by Gym Class Heroes came on, which was amazing, cause Lozz and I got to yell, "I LOVE MY LIFE, BITCHEZ!!"

Because Sue and Sophie were nice enough to make sure no one took our places at the barrier, Lozz and I got to wander off and speak to the FVK guys. Drew is actually amazing; we spent ages just cuddling, laughing and joking, being really sarcastic towards each other. I tried to steal his two bead bracelets, and he fought me, saying, "No! You can have one, but not both!" so I kind of have a friendship bracelet thing with him now, squeee! It was amusing watching him trying to untangle the bracelets from each other. I signed up to the FVK mailing list and in the 'comments' section I simply wrote "I fancy Drew." -- he laughed when he saw it. Another reason I love him is because he let me take him ELSEWHERE. I literally picked him up and stormed away with him. He said, "You're strong!" and I said, "There's nothing to you, boy." then tried to wipe a speck of eyeliner off his nose; it didn't work so he licked his hand and ferociously wiped at his nose. It made no difference and escalated into a conversation about mums trying to spitwash their kids and how much we hated it when we were younger. He also said he'd call the fuzz cause I said he looks about 12 and he decided that I was a paedo for fancying him. He's 22 -_-' And I sorted his hair cause he had bits of product and talc from the antique-ing scenario in it. Awwhhh, love him!
When we got back from ELSEWHERE, Laurence was there and also tried to get rid of the eyeliner on Drew's nose; I watched this, fascinated, and Lozz and I burst out into, "IT MUST BE LOVE, LOVE, LOVE!! *sings riff*" Then I told Lozz a story which involved a lot of extravagant sign language; the FVK boys looked awestruck. Kier has a really cute tattoo of his name on his left inner wrist; he said he got it so he doesn't forget his name. I said, "Cool." then walked away from him XD Not before I had a go at stroking his INCREDIBLE chest rug!! He's actually beaten Ben Jolliffe!! :o As I said to a bewildered Drew, "It's a paradox, we're all gonna die." And another gig tradition was fulfilled when Lozz inked 'Mo ♥ Angel's cock' on Mo's arm. Ohhh outrage.

The second support act, The Dead Formats, were wubbish, so we stayed at the back with the FVK boys for their set. The bowlcut guy from earlier was there, which provoked lots of laughter and Mo doing an impression of the hairstyle, making me and Drew crack up. We saw two lookalikes at this point; one was "Mikey Way!?" and the other was "Gaskin!?" (this was especially funny as Drew from FVK looks a lot like John Be, but cuter ;D and Shane looks like a more masculine Simon Rowlands), and there was another guy that we nicknamed 'Jake's Dad' cause he looked like he should be Jake off Aiden's dad. I spent a lot of TDF's set shouting "Y U CLAPPIN!?" at Drew and "FVK BACK PLS!" at the stage.

Anyway.. We got back to the front for Aiden, who were UH-MAZING as per usual! I kept making uncouth hand gestures towards Nick, who was stood right in front of us. Sue joined in and Lozz almost choked to death laughing at us. Wil kept trying to make the security guy let us over the barrier, but the guy was being a right spoilsport and saying no; Wil tried to tempt him with 'twenty pounds, and Angel'll blow ya' -- this was amusing but the security didn't take the bait, so Lozz and I swore at his back. Nick loved this, as he kept laughing when we did it. Jake had no shirt on and I screamed at Lozz, "JAKE'S A PAEDO AGAIN!!" this was repeated several times throughout the set for emphasis. Speaking of naked, I shouted at Wil "GET NAKED!!" he said, "What?" and I was like "GET. NAKED." he said, "I can't hear you?" and I said, "C'MERE!" he leaned forward and I said, "NAKED." at him. He said into the mic, "Get naked? Is that an actual request?" and everyone screamed. He didn't get naked unfortunately. When they did 'Moment' I sung, "When our lips collide and almost stop the earth." at Nick and he smiled so much. And when I sung "You're in my arms tonight!" he put his hand on his heart and just looked at me. Ohh, stop it Nick!!
I had some really funny interaction with Wil. He said, "Jeez, I know it's Sunday but you're all like.. Dead." I said, "FUCK YOU!!" and Wil laughed before saying, "Fuck you, they say!" and everyone laughed. He said something later on and I said, "SUCK MY DICK." he said into the microphone, "Suck my dick, she said!" and I threw my hands up and got a cheer from everyone. I told him to 'GET YOUR ASS OVER HERE NOW!' and he actually said to Nick, "I'ma go over here." and stood where Nick had been! Hahahahaa, he had a ripped shirt on so I exclaimed, "I can see your breast!" and he snarled at me. I also said, "Nice bum!" when he had his back to me, so he mooned the audience. Everyone cheered, then as he pulled his trousers up, Sarah, Sue, Lozz, Sophie and I immediately started yelling, "OFF! OFF! OFF! OFF!" -- it was grand. At the end of the set, Nick threw his bass violently before storming off the stage -- sexaaaay! And Wil shrugged on his leather jacket, at which point 'Jake's Dad', who was suddenly behind me, shouted, "Don't put it back on!! Take it all off!!" Lozz had to Eiffel Tower him and I shook his hand. He asked for another handshake cause I have a 'good, firm handshake' :D There was a bit of a Bass Crew going on cause Lozz, Tom, Drew and I were chatting for a while. I asked Drew if he had a spare pick I could have; he said, "I have A pick...." and pulled it out of his pocket. It's yellow and really worn where he's used it so much and it's mine now, eeeeee! For this, I had to take Drew FAR AWAY (i.e. outside of the venue) so I picked him up and manhandled him halfway out, where I lost my strength. "You don't have to stay off the ground." "I think I can walk."

Even more excellent things happened outside. Lozz wrote 'batty' in the dirt on Aiden's van (there is a picture) and so the BATTY VAN was born. I spent some time chatting with (or chatting up) Shane from FVK; he is truly lovely. He let me steal his amazing steampunk goggles for a bit and wear them on my head. And I stole his stripy tie as well, because I could. He got that back by fluttering his eyelashes and looking sweet. Lozz told him he should be honoured when I stiffly patted him on the head a few times, 'trying to be nice'. He said, "I am honoured!" and Lozz walked off to talk to Laurence. I said to Shane, "Do you think I'm horrid?" and he said, "No! You're lovely!" and I shuffled over to him saying, "I'm horrible.. I'm horrible.." I think he thought I was actually upset cause he scooped me up into his arms and said, "Do you want to wear my tie again?" I nodded mutely, and he said, "Do you want to steal it off me?" and I nodded again before feebly undoing the tie. He took it off and put it around my neck with a decisive, "There you go!" and another hug. He is LUSH. He also had a polar bear hat/scarf thing, and I stole that too. But he fought me and got it back. Good man!
I told Drew, "I fancy Shane more than you!" and he just stuck his bottom lip out and widened his eyes; I immediately flew at him and hugged him to death, exclaiming that I could never fancy Shane more than him. I squeezed Drew's chin and he went, "Ohhh, not my bum chin! It's massive!" and I squeezed his entire face. I love that he didn't try to stop me, just carried on talking even though his face was all squished up. Cute. He kept coming back after saying he was off and I said, "Y U STILL HERE!?!" he said, "I'm waiting for Shane. COME ON POLAR BEAR WE HAVE TO GO!" Awhhh. After he'd gone (properly), Sophie said, "He laaaaaaikes you." and I said, ".....No. Don't be silly." so she said, "He's fonddddd of you!" Once again. I wish.
Also, I hugged Laurence Vane just to put my freezing hands in his jacket to warm them up. He wouldn't let go of me til I said my hands had warmed up XD
Angel came outside and I slammed over to him shouting, "Angel! My favourite Mexican!" he said, "How do you know I'm Mexican? Is it my dark hair? ...Or my olive skin?" I said, "It's your proceeding hairline, babe." He called Wil a Jew for no reason, and has said that Lozz and I can go to Day of the Dead in Mexico with him! SSSSAFE!! I'ma hold him to that XD I told him to suck my dick and he said, "I can't.. I have a girlfriend." I said, "Oh.. But Wil loves my cock!" Angel said, "Yes he does!" I decided I loved his voice a lot, and asked him, "Can you read Harry Potter books to me?" -- for some reason everyone laughed. I was being serious X__X Angel is an absolute sweetheart; I'm glad I've finally met him PROPERLY.
Nick was just as amazing as last time I saw him. I told him that his (severely ripped) jeans were lovely but that I couldn't see any leg hair on stage. He was wearing different jeans at this point and pulled one leg up, exclaiming, "I do have leg hair!" He let Lozz and I give the leg hair a bit of a stroke to make sure it was real. We also got to yank his V-neck down and perv over his chest tattoos. We had a bit of a fondle and a stroke, and I observed his chest hairs. "Nick you're so buff these days! Nice sex lines!" "Thank you!" I told him I'm still worried about his drinking and he said, "Oh don't worry about me.." and we hugged. It was magic. AND HE PULLED HIDEOUS FACES WITH ME!! There is a photo, don't panic!!
Finally.. Wil came outside. Ohhhh my. I don't think he was just 'wiL' though; he was acting more like Control, which excited me. As we were waiting for some freaks to get out of the way, Tom and I sung, "THIS IS HOW WE DO IT!!" like on Step Brothers, including Will Ferrell's stupid riff singing, and thrusted towards Wil. This was very amusing, as Kerry and Lozz joined in. As soon as I got to Wil, I hugged him and said, "I haven't got a penis really." he said, "I know.. You'd be more interesting if you did have though." I said, "Oh." he said, "If you had a vagina and a dick, that'd be even better." I said, "Well, sorry for not being interesting enough for you." he snaked his arm around my waist and snarled, "You are interesting enough." into my ear. FRACK. That man!! What has he got that makes him so delicious!? I told him, "Anyway, I prefer Control to Francis." -- he said, "Neither of them give a shit." and I said, "Oh my God Wil, stop being so complimentary!" and batted my lashes. He looked at me with awed respect and became considerably warmer towards me after that. He also said to Lozz, "Slag--what!?" when she complimented him XD

Eventually I had to leave, and so I hugged all my gig pals and turned to find Wil slowly wiggling his fingers at me. I said, "Shall we try to be nice for a sec?" before we hugged, he said in my ear, "Enjoy your night.. See you next time.." and gave me a squeeze and a breathe down my neck. Fracking flirt. I walked away with jelly legs. Corrrrrpus callosum! This gig was uhhhhhrrrrr-mazin.

Here are the photos -- you know what to do ;D Go laugh yourselves silly!

-- Kayleigh

Saturday

2010-12-08T07:15:00.000-08:00

So, on my way to Lozz's on Saturday, I decided it would be fine if I wore white canvas daps outside. What possessed me to do this when there was ice on the floor and it was raining? I'm not sure, but soon enough my feet were soaked through. I swear I could've gotten trench foot, things were that bad. Aaaanyway, the hottest man in the whole world got on the bus at the same stop as me. He was lovely, and I stole a few glances at him (occasionally getting caught) to get a full description for y'all. Aren't I nice? He was tall and thin, and had a hat on, under which you could just see a messy dark brown fringe; he had black and white mittens, a brown coat, a scarf, a bottle green jumper, stubble, straight leg jeans, big eyes, and an amazing pair of brown brogues. Ohh my, he was actually a divine creature. And he was chatting to some prehistoric footie hooligans for a while, at which point I observed he had a nice voice and perfect teeth. This kind of man always makes me mad, because perfect people like that DO exist, cause I've seen them with my own eyeballs. Argh, he was lush.

Also, I'm sorry the Aiden blog is taking sooo long; I have literally not had time to do anything. It should be up later today though, all going well, so keep checking back! It will be worth the wait :) And there will almost certainly be a new Overheard in the near future. Don't I spoil you lot?

-- Kayleigh

FVK ♥

2010-12-06T11:46:00.000-08:00

Listen to these gorgeous boys. The one on the right reminds me of John Be so is my favourite. And he let me take him ELSEWHERE :) Wait for the Aiden blog to get all the deetz of the gig and the lovely photos of these gorgeous guys and some other blokes, including a Mexican. Are you excited?? You should be. Atm I'm in college, living off Monster and feeling slightly in love with Drew (far right, as I said). Mo sung, to the tune of 'Bad Things' by Jace Everett, "I wanna do bad things with Drew."

....I agree. GO LISTEN TO FEARLESS VAMPIRE KILLERS. THEY'RE LUSH. I definitely take back saying "They look like if One Direction died!" when I first saw them XD

-- Kayleigh

Bangin & Blindness

2010-12-03T21:43:00.000-08:00

Actual photographic proof that Maggie did in fact write 'Bangin' (with a rather excitable exclamation mark) on my Media essay. I was so fucking happy, I threw my hands up and praised the Lord. It was such a brilliant moment.
I forgot to write that yesterday, Lozz and I leaned into Martha's classroom before my A2 lesson, when she had a class in there, and I said, "WE LOVE YOU MARTHA!" and Martha blew kisses XD Also, in AS Psychology, Kieran said he 'has writing like a spakker' and everyone laughed cause it was so appropriately inappropriate. And Martha told him off for violently swearing, and he said, "That's the first time I've sworn in my LIFE!!" which made me laugh some.

Tonight, Liam decided to do a bit of LUMOS in the garden before leaving for Wales:

Very eerie and I'm now blind. Cheers for that, Liam.

-- Kayleigh

P.S. Everyone go and buy some Young Guns merch, and send lovely messages to @YoungGunsUK on Twitter, cause they had nine weeks' worth of merchandise money stolen by a complete heartless CUNT. I'd really appreciate it if anyone reading this supported the guys in any way possible right now, it's killing my heart how much bad luck they've been getting.

2010-12-03T11:10:00.000-08:00

Corr!

2010-12-03T10:24:00.000-08:00

I've just realised that I'm seeing Aiden the day after tomorrow.
BOOYAKASHAAAA!!!

..What does that even mean??

I Look Like A Peacock

2010-12-03T09:12:00.000-08:00

After college on Wednesday, I met up with Ollie in town. He insisted that we went to Cafe Nerro so he could warm up cause he's a skinny bitch and was waaay too cold. Anyway, he bought me a hot chocolate, so I wasn't complaining. We sat in the warm and had a chat, caught up, and it was really nice. He referred to me down the phone as his 'best friend' and didn't complain when I kept squishing his face in a condescending manner. I had so much fun just hanging around town with Ollie; he was amazed at what a sex pest I am (I'm sorry, I saw Sky Guy AND Elongated Bean, can you blame me??) and we played for ages in Hawkins Bazaar; he was fixated by a remote control tarantula, I was attacking him with a paper thing and a colourful snake that wasn't colourful at all, just green. We bullied each other and messed about and insulted passers-by and it just reminded me of how much I love Ollie. If by some freak accident he's reading this, hello Oliver. I lub you.
Also on Wednesday, I had a shower at my Vati's house to wash my STAINING EVERYTHING HAIR. I washed it three times over, blinding myself in the cascade of blue water coming from my noggin. Honestly, everything was blue. I managed to clear it all up though, and now my hair doesn't stain anymore!! Whoop!!

Although, yesterday, I woke up and realised that my hair is now the colour of a peacock. This made me extremely happy. In Geoggers, Stacey and I had a laugh all lesson, as per usual. I love chatting to her, she is so much like me, minus the angry and pessimistic nature. She's like the sunshine version of me :D I got so mad at Mark I threatened to shit on him and I thought Stacey was going to collapse, she found it so funny. In a Geoggers practice question I did last week I got 6/8.
Continuing on the Kayleigh is a filthy neek vein, in my A2 Psychology test I got 19/20, so I was chuffed to bits. I don't know why I've been doing so well lately, but I'm not complaining! Also, Lozz gave me some sweets before the lesson so I was in my element, trying to eat a jelly snake like Noel Fielding in the first series of the Boosh.

AS Psychology was HILARIOUS. We had a huge, mad discussion about conjoined twins, in which Buff Kieran said that twins are 'basically only half a person' and Sean asked, "If two conjoined twins had sex, would the baby be conjoined?" Kieran collapsed laughing and Martha told us not necessarily. I said, "How awkward would that be? Hey these are my parents.. I'm normal?" and Kieran said, "You'd have, like, four parents." and everyone laughed again. He is so fucking funny, it's mad. Someone made the mistake of mentioning the World Cup bids and Kieran immediately lost his mind and begged Martha to go on the Sky Sports News website ("IT'S THE BEST WEBSITE EVER!!") He told me that 'women don't like sport' and I said, "I like ice hockey." He said it wasn't a real sport; Lozz and I jumped to our feet and stared at him. The whole class went, "Ohhhh!!" and I spent the next ten minutes shouting Kieran down with every reason why hockey is better than football (there are many reasons). He tried to say football players are better looking -- REALLY!?! And I said, "You only have to touch a football player with an eyelash and he's down on the floor, crying. Hockey players break all their limbs and carry on going!" That shut him up :)
After the lesson, he was behind us, singing footie chants. I said to Lozz, "He's actually lost his mind." Kieran said, "IT'S A GOOD SONG!" I was like, "Song? Really?" And he told me he'd gotten wrecked whilst watching the World Cup and that it was the best thing ever. I was like, "Ok, boy. Whatever you say." and Lozz offered him a tiny candycane. He said, "Aw go on then!" and it was excellent.

So um.. What's this? Rapport with the most gorgeous guy in our class?
Oh. Mein. Gott. In. Himmel.

-- Kayleigh

(8)We saw him in a gayyyybaaaarr(8)

2010-12-03T09:01:00.000-08:00

Ermm.. Tuesday then! I've been slacking as usual. Soz. Not that anyyyyoooonnnneeee cares :) At the bus stop, I was having a communal bitching session with two old women and an old man about how a pathetic veneer of dandruff on the streets has caused buses to run at stupid-ass times. I rather enjoyed this session, and enjoyed it more when one of the old women that was participating complimented my hair colour. I launched into an angry discussion about how my hair was staining EVERYTHING for no good reason. It was rather hilarious. My bus driver looked like he should be in JLS, not driving a bus in Swindon.
In Psychology, all we did was make brightly-coloured revision mind maps. I was absolutely fine with this. After the lesson, we saw the teacher guy that we once saw in Mailcoach (i.e. a gay bar) and Lozz and I sung, to the tune of Things You See In The Graveyard from Repo!, "We saw him in a gayyyybaaaarr!" and it was far too funny.
Maggs and I had some lols in the darkroom while I was waiting for my stupid 4pm lesson -_-' She managed to make up a really funny chat-up line cause I was discussing the term 'trouser snake' and said, "Wouldn't it be horrible if it actually WAS a snake!?" and Maggs laughed hysterically, for ages, before choking out, "My trouser snake's hungry!" and we pretty much collapsed for ten minutes. Her friends were quite bewildered. I loved hanging out with Maggs in the darkroom; I don't think we stopped laughing. Also, when I was sat down in the library, I saw Chris up in the OLC and called him; he stood there, watching me and holding his phone, and we had a phone conversation in plain sight of each other. I loved this.

Media was shite, but getting the bus back to Wroughton with Lee was quite amusing. We chatted about the cold, our hair and being mistaken for the opposite gender. He taught me the '50s shock' expression and I taught him the 'Kidulthood invisible knife stance'. The bus was really late (surprise, surprise) and Lee said, "I didn't realise the bus timetable was just a SUGGESTION." We did consider getting another bus and just telling them to drive us to Wroughton whilst holding out our invisible knives. I said, "They'd just bitch us out though." and Lee said, in a Chav voice, "If I'd wanted you to tell me where I was going, I would've ASKED." which made me lol for some time. So did Lee threatening to cut the driver's ponytail off and use it as a face warmer. When we were finally on the bus, we sat at the back and there wasn't a bell near us. Lee commented on this, then took out an invisible bell, and started ringing it, saying, "Jeeves! Could you stop the bus now pls?" I admired the filthy state of the window next to us and said, "Jeeves, do clean this window. It's appalling." -- we also had a Ridgeway therapy session, which was wonderful. I love chatting with ex-Ridgewaylians, it is always like counselling for a traumatic event :)

-- Kayleigh

"My conclusion is BANGIN!"

2010-11-29T19:13:00.000-08:00

For the record, this is the colour of my hair nowadays:

Indeed, the first thing Maggie said to me today was, "You've gone blue!" I said, "Yes I have!" and felt flattered that my TEACHER had noticed my change of hair colour. Excellent! Mo was talking about the fact that he did shitly in Media last year and Maggie said, "Well I was an AQA moderator for a while.." and Mo cut her off with, "So it's your fault I failed then." I laughed far too much. And in the information we were reading, it said that people 'use films to pleasure themselves' -- I turned to Mo, thunderstruck, and said, "I don't have a wank to the Shawshank Redemption!" He laughed so much I thought he was about to die. He drew a really wonky moustache on his finger and held it to his lip. I said, "Gustache!?" and we laughed about that for some time. Sean and I were exchanging terrified/despairing looks across the room and laughing while Maggie was talking; unfortunately I got the giggles, so Maggie threatened to split me and Mo up. I said, "OMG BULLYING." and she found this funny. Wot. Then we had to write a timed essay *grooooan* but it was alright cause it was quite a good question and it was funny cause I still had the giggles. Mo drew a jagged line on the corner of my paper and whispered, "Look.. Someone got hungry." I picked up the paper and tore that corner off with my teeth; Mo cracked up laughing again. And when Maggie collected everyone's work and got to me, I said, "My conclusion is BANGIN!" and she laughed too much. I said, "Can you do me a favour? Can you PLEASE write, after your serious comment, 'your conclusion was banging'?" and I think I've actually convinced her to do it! She'd better!!!

Jason's lesson was great as per usual. We've moved on to friendship/popularity in our child development topic and Jason was talking about personal space. I regaled the class with the story about Ron getting all up in my grill last year. I said, "Then I said, 'I'm not being funny, but get the fuck outta my grill'." and everyone laughed then I added, "It was getting a bit rapey." and everyone laughed more. Once more, and not for the first time recently, I felt popular. Jason said that when he asks people to guess what he teaches, they always say Music, before rolling his eyes and holding up his extensive ponytail; it flailed up in the air in such a way that it reduced the whole class to hysterics for some time. I love Jason's lesson sfm; the banter is excellent, and everyone is more relaxed in that lesson than in Jen's stupid A2 classes.

Freya and I spent lunchtime laughing at pictures of Voldemort.

When I got to Geoggers, Abigail, Stacey and Lucia all said they loved my new hair colour, which was very good for my soul, as I'm still rather unsure about it (the blue is lovely, but there's a green/teal colour underneath it all that kind of makes me look like the sea). Stacey and I were comparing our watermelon lipbalms and I told them all a story about Liam. He once walked into my room, took my strawberry lipbalm, wound it all out of the container, bit it off and chewed it 'to get the flavour out', then spat it on my floor and walked out. They all laughed for a considerable amount of time, then Lucia asked, "How old is your brother?" I said, "Twenty-one." and they dissolved again. Oh, I'm so hilarious.. Let's not lie here. Then Stacey and I spent the rest of the lesson in hysterics. This is because of something we remembered from Mark's lesson last week. He was talking about when people got milk delivered to their door, and he said that -- quite often -- birds would come and prod their beaks through the milk tops and drink the milk. He said, "And you don't want that after a bird's put its grotty old beak in your milk bottle." Now whenever we think about it, we laugh (I'm crying with laughter now), and I kept telling her to get her grotty old beak out of my milk bottle. Ohhh, how we chuckled. They were all afraid though, cause I was in an aggressively good mood today, for no reason.

After obnoxiously queue jumping to get on the bus from college quicker, I had a most hilarious journey into town. There was an absolutely stupid amount of people crowded on the bus, and I was squashed up behind an absolutely GORGEOUS guy. He had the most amazingly long eyelashes I've ever seen and everything about him was just oooooft, scrumptious. We kept catching each others' eyes and doing that cute smiling-then-looking-away-not-quite-awkwardly thing. Ohhh, I loved him. Some people on the bus were as obnoxious as me, and kept pressing the bell for no reason; it was all very funny. What was even better was when a guy actually did get off the bus; all I heard was him say, "I think I should probably crowd surf to get out." (cause he was at the back of the bus), then he shuffled past everyone, singing an epic tune. EVERYONE laughed. I love communal moments like that (and like the Glee singalong that Lozz and I were involved in on the bus on our first ever Moustache Night :D).

I am in a bloody amazing mood, thank you very much!

-- Kayleigh

P.S. I texted Lozz about Simon from Misfits and -- instead of saying 'Corrrr!' as I usually would -- I said, "Corrrrpus callosum!" which, if you must know, is part of the brain. Oh, the cleverness of me!

P.P.S. And here's a picture of the ceremonial bad memory burning:

"Myra??"

2010-11-28T21:15:00.000-08:00

Yesterday Lozz and I burned loads of stuff. Bad memories, shall we say. It was really cleansing, really therapeutic and I'm glad we did it. We used a whole bottle of white spirit, so you can imagine the fun we had. Later, Kevin threw some takeaway menus at Lozz, exclaiming, "It's snowing!" and when Lozz bleached my hair to dye it blue, Kevin took one look at me and said, "Myra?? Is that you??" Oh my God, how my sides ached. The hair dye-ing was a fucking disaster; my hair literally looked like a mouldy piece of bread. So today, Lozz and launched into town for emergency dye (me wearing a hat, OBVZ). We got some blue hair dye and had an Elongated Bean encounter. I asked the other guy behind the counter for an Oreo Tower and he said, "We have no whipped cream..." and Elongated Bean said, "Do you want extra Oreos on top?" and nodded at me with a 'fuckyeah' expression on his face. I said, "Yeah, do it!!" then when he was fixing it for us, I said, "That's useless.. No whipped cream.. Shittest Oreo Tower ever." and Elongated Bean loved it, the slag. He is actually gorgeous and I think I'm a little bit in love with him. Also a shelf collapsed in Cex when Lozz touched it and a random boy had to help her put it back up cause I was too busy laughing and being distracted by a picture of Jason Statham on the front cover of Crank. In HMV, Lozz and I were walking up the stairs chatting, and were just looking at the World Cinema section when some man lumbered in and asked if we'd said something at his toddler thing. Lozz was like, "No?" and I said, "She was chatting to me?" and the guy said, "Are you sure?" I was like, "Yeah I'm pretty sure she'd be talking to her friend, not you or your sprog." and he tried to call us a 'pair of skanky bitches' . LOVELY. Lozz shouted after him, "AND I'M THE ONE SWEARING, AM I?? YOU'RE SO MATURE." What a wanker.

The second dye-ing fiasco worked a lot better; my hair now looks like the sea and I am in love with Simon from the E4 show Misfits. He is genuinely GORGEOUS.

-- Kayleigh

Psychology Lolz.

2010-11-26T09:16:00.000-08:00

Honestly, I live for Martha's lessons; they just get funnier and funnier every week. I told her yesterday that her lesson is my favourite and she seemed genuinely pleased. Lozz painted my nails teal with black zebra lines, so my nails look amazing now XD I was really on the ball at the beginning of Martha's lesson, answering loads of questions and getting lots of things right. I was so on the ball that GaGa called me clever in an awestruck voice. Buff Kieran was asked something about Wernicke's area and he said, "...It was a good bit of kit? I dunno." and everyone laughed. He's lush. We were talking about autopsies and I said, "I dressed as an autopsy for Halloween!" GaGa said, "Awesome! I dressed as a dead baby!" and Lozz and I laughed too much. There's a guy called Broca that discovered an area of the brain, and we all started calling him Berocca. Ohh, we are funny -_-' Martha asked who he did an autopsy on, and I said, "Me." before I could stop myself. Annoying Guy kept saying annoying things that weren't funny, so I exchanged exasperated looks with GaGa and she pretended to shoot him. I loved her for it. Martha was talking about someone being thick and Lozz and I said, at EXACTLY the same time, in EXACTLY the same tone of voice, "I'm thick." Everyone, including Martha, cracked up laughing for ages. I loved it so much, it felt like being cool. Buff Kieran, who had spent most of the lesson scribbling on his book, trying to get his pen to work, asked Martha if she had a pen he could use. Keira said that she had a BRAND NEW pen that she didn't need that he could have. Kieran said, "Aw, this is the best day of my life." Ohh, he's gorgeous and funny. Purfick! Martha told me that I never stop talking and Lozz said, "Yeah but at least she's not one of those people that never stops talking and doesn't say anything interesting." before glaring at Annoying Guy. GaGa, Phish Food, GaGa's friend, Lozz and I laughed and bitched about him across the room for ages. No one knew who we were talking about. It was exquisite. I also exchanged a smile with Buff Kieran. Oh my God, did I die? A bit, yeah. We learned about Schwann cells, and that they're white. Phish Food said, "Like a swan." and we all despaired of him. Then Martha made the mistake of using the word 'cleft'. Lozz and I deteriorated and she brandished her Outrage! cards at the room, in particular the Tony Harrison card. We saw a really pretty illustration of a brain -- it was reeeeally colourful. I said, in a transport of delight, "I want my brain dyed that colour!" everyone laughed again. Er, why? Then.. And I'm not making this up.. We made neurons out of colourful pipe cleaners! Oh my God, it was SO FUN!! Mine was pink and green! And Phish Food made a giraffe that he wouldn't give me as a present -- I later attacked him, but he still didn't give me a giraffe!!

On the bus, a greb touched my ass so I turned around and decked him. Fair play. I'm glad I was wearing gloves though; imagine the horrible diseases I would've gotten if I had bare hands. Also, I had a bit of a cry on the bus cause Young Guns came on and I remembered that poor Goose is all lurgified and has lost his voice. Mortifying but satisfyingly cleansing. Ahh.

-- Kayleigh

P.S. And I just read an eMail from my tutor saying that my UCAS application has been sent off. EEEEEEEEEEK, SCARED MUCH!?!!!

Walk Out Fail.

2010-11-26T08:58:00.000-08:00

So on Wednesday, the Great College Walkout Of 2010 happened. I'm being sarcastic. Everyone was supposed to walk out of lessons in protest against limitless Uni fees and the abolition of EMA. Umm.. Some people did. But all I saw of this protest was a few people eating cake, holding posters with cannabis leaves on saying 'LEGALISE' and a picture of David Cameron saying 'TWAT'. Oh, and a group of guys ran down the stairs, chanting, "CAMERON IS A WANKER." repeatedly, like football hooligans. Chav Jack was involved -- is anyone surprised?

We hardly needed the three police cars, the riot van and the news photographer. It was all a bit of a let-down -- I was most disappointed.

Documentaries about Nazis

2010-11-23T20:53:00.000-08:00

In Psychology, anything that sounded like it could be replaced with the word 'paedo' suffered. Therefore, 'libido' became 'lipaedo', which in turn became 'le paedo', which I decided had to be French for paedophile (i.e. Mr Tickle off the Mr Men series). Then Jen made the mistake of mentioning the Oedipus complex. Yes, it's as bad as you think it is. PAEDOPUS COMPLEX. I then said Mr Tickle is a paedopus 'cause he's like an octopus but.. Paedophilic.' -- what's wrong with us?

In the library, Lozz was telling me about seeing Mix Of Everything, and we were all excitable about that. Then we saw him and Lozz said, "Speak of the Devil.." I said, "Speak of the Devil and I WILL RAPE THE DEVIL!!" -- unfortunately, I think MOA heard me. Bollox.

Lozz reminded me of some more segments from the Young Guns times. When I spilled out our tragic story of our financial woes, Bean was vair sympathetic and lovely. He attempted to scoop us both into hugs, but I was in the process of barging off to see Frase, so didn't hear him say, "You two are so dedicated; you're more like friends to us!" -- OHH, BENJAMIN!! What a beaut. And Lozz also reminded me that -- when YG went offstage before their encore -- everyone was screaming, and shouting 'ENCORE!' -- so I started rapping 'Numb/Encore' by Jay-Z feat. Linkin Park. Hahahaha, loads of people around me joined in, it was like being famous.

In Lozz's Photography, where I was lounging about like a lion, Lozz and I were using hairspray cans and Play Doh containers as rolling pins, and making the Play Doh really flat and thin. We then took turns punching these flimsy bits of Doh, and it was so much fun for something so simple. I cracked up laughing later when I spotted tiny bits of Play Doh debris on the floor from where I punched a piece so violently that the entire middle section fragmented and fell on the floor. Ohh outrage! Lozz then told me about 'College Emre', who -- very simply -- looks like Emre but goes to our college. And Sam told someone playing crappy BMTH type music to 'turn that shite off'. Yes, she is the teacher. It was EXCELLENT.

I turned up to Media late, and Una got irrationally angry when I muttered that I didn't care about being late and missing some of her bor-ring speech about the next part of the course. Then she was asking what stuff we liked to watch; I mentioned all the funny programmes I like, then -- for a mad twist -- added that I like 'documentaries about Nazis' (which is true, Liam's fault). I then proceeded to quote the Crack Fox in The Mighty Boosh ("IT WAS A NAZI MAN!!"). Mo mentioned that he likes the programme Misfits (which is really good actually) and Una asked when it was on. Mo said, "Ten'o'clock" and I said, "Oooh, you have to stay up past your bedtime to watch it!" and everyone laughed. Ohh, to be popular. Una mentioned Coronation Street and Sean said, "Ohhh, everyone loves a bit of Corrie!" Mo said, "Yeah, even Snoop loves Corrie!" It's true -- Snoop Dogg loves Coronation Street so much, he actually wants a cameo role in it and wants to build his own Rovers Return inn in LA. Oh my God, excellent! This makes me love Snoop even more than before. Then Una asked what happened in 1953; Sean simply said, "The Queen." what he meant was the Queen's coronation. I said, appalled, "How old IS she!?" and Una was like, "She's in her eighties now I think." I said, "What LIZZEEEEE?? Lizzy Windsor!?" And then Sean said, "She doesn't wanna die, does she!!" -- lots of respect for our Queenie. There was less respect for a Tory MP saying that 'Britain has never had it better', echoing an old Prime Minister's quote. He came under fire for it because IT SIMPLY ISN'T TR00!! I said to Mo, "Excuse me!? Never had it better?? The country's a mess and you lot are making even more of a HASH of it!" and Mo laughed cause I used the phrase 'making a hash of it'. Speaking of phrase, Una kept using that word and it reminded me of Frase, e.g. Fraser Taylor. Ohhh. And because he is gorge, I kept getting distracted whenever she said it.

I saw College Emre on the bus. He kept eyeing me with interest D:

And.. It's Fraser Taylor's birthday tomorrow. Awhhh.

-- Kayleigh

"YES, Bus Girl!"

2010-11-22T18:11:00.000-08:00

Hahahaaa, Hula Hoops strikes again. On my way downstairs after dropping Lozz at Sociology, I walked past him in the corridors. He gave me a downwards man-nod and said, "YES, Bus Girl!" I absolutely loved it, and gave him a man-nod in return. It was a classic moment. And a tiny child referred to me as Larry.. What fresh hell? Furthermore, I've decided I'm going to ask Emre to marry me. Yep.

Stuff I Forgot

2010-11-22T14:22:00.000-08:00

I forgot a few things about the Young Guns gig and surrounding times, which I will now post in the form of BULLET POINTS OMG.
>> Before the gig, when we were mooching around Gloucester, we sat in KFC for ages, laughing at the people in there. And Lozz was really disappointed cause the bins had a bar down the middle of the hole to put rubbish in, so she couldn't play her favourite game of Putting The Food Tray In The Bin. Luckily, though, she managed to play this the next day at Burger King, so she was cheered up immensely.
>> The second support act were called Spy Catcher. If you're interested.
>> Lozz and I sung Liberty X's 'Just A Little' at Fraser when YG were on stage (e.g. "SEXEEEEEE, EVERYTING ABOUT YOU SO SEXEEEEEE!") then Gus was talking, so we shut up and stood there, deadpan, til he stopped, and continued the song. ("YOU DON' EVEN KNOW WATCHOO GAH-AH-AHT!!") Yeahhh. He doesn't. He really does not see how FUCKING BUFFTING HE IS. I said it. Get over it.
>> We told Gus that Annie wasn't coming to the gig and that we'd sort of been relying on her for a lift and consequently had to use all our money just to get to the show. Gus' eyes widened and he said, "What a bitch!" which was amusing. He looked sad for us though, which was nice and horrid cause when that boy looks sad it ruins my heart. Fortunately, we weren't affected as much as usual because of that AWFUL MOUSTACHE D:

Today was full of Nazi moon bases, Pokémon Yellow, a Child Social Development test on privation in Psychology (along with Jason's asides about his college years, which was always amusing), white chocolate buttons, testing Mountain Dew Energy in the canteen (and wanting to steal the same-height-as-me cardboard cutout of the bottle), Buff Kieran having a new dark green coat and looking AMAZING, and at 4pm I have to see the lovely Dr Paget (Puget.. Paget.. Paget.. Puget.. Oh God.) to talk about how I'm getting on with the medication she put me on. Fair play.

-- Kayleigh

Footnotes

2010-11-21T17:55:00.000-08:00

Because there's not been much to blog about.. I told Mo to tell Maggie that I wouldn't be in Media because 'a Chinese man with a frozen face stuffed my throat with Buckaroo instructions' -- I got that excuse from Vince Noir. Mo actually told her as well! He said, "I don't think she believed me much." XD Ohhhh, outrage! And I've spent most of my time at Lozz's playing Pokémon Yellow on the game boy and watching the CBBC channel. It's been good, and we had pizza last night -- AWHHH STOBBIT.

Gloucester

2010-11-21T17:23:00.000-08:00

On Wednesday, it was absolutely foul weather. Lozz and I first went to the Toys'R'Us across the road from our Travelodge and messed about in there for hours. We took photos (which you'll have seen if you looked at the picture page in my previous post) and generally made a nuisance of ourselves. And we bought a pot of Play Doh each to amuse ourselves on the train; I had bright orange and Lozz had pink -- we split them half and half though, so now we both have a bit of each colour. We went to Burger King where we stole card hats that had a cowboy hat on one side and a sombrero on the other. Excellent! We also visited Hobbycraft, where we had fun looking at acrylic paints and using pens and pencils to write things on the tester pads (again, if you saw the picture page you'll have seen some evidence of this already). Also in Hobbycraft, Lozz spilled a load of small polystyrene balls on the floor and it was bloody hilarious thanks. For the rest of the day we trundled around the town centre, looking around shops, wasting time in Waterstones by reading funny books, and complaining about the rain.

On the train home, we amused ourselves with Play Doh and Outrage! then two really annoying, loud French boys got on the train so we came up with a better thing to play. I call it Kicking The Back Of Really Annoying, Loud French Boys' Seats. Hahahaa :')

-- Kayleigh

YOUNG GUNS 6

2010-11-21T17:13:00.000-08:00

So, on Tuesday we got to Gloucester without a hitch, and honestly? We weren't impressed with it. It's a bit of a shithole if I'm honest, but it wasn't as bad as some places I've been. We quickly found our way around, as the station was close to the town which was close to our hotel. It was all very convenient. So we struggled to the hotel and dumped our stuff in our room. Because our train was at midday-ish, we ended up at the venue really early and were sitting in a corridor where the original 'Jai Ho' song was playing, and had a chance meeting with Carrie, a friend of ours from the Young Guns gig back in May at Furnace. This was amusing as we whiled away the long wait by chattering about rubbish and laughing at a mental woman that Carrie knows who confronted everyone that tried to queue-cut us. She was brilliant! I saw Johnny by the merch table and had a chat with him for a while, beginning with pulling on his moustache (which doesn't actually look bad). He told me he was extremely tired and slumped onto my shoulder for a bit. I asked where Fraser was 'because I want to pull his bum fluff' and Johnny loved it, the slag. And I told him I'd spent all my money just to get there (which is tr00) and he said, "Good girl!" I felt proud of myself for a while. Then Gus came out to the merch table with a Macbook balanced precariously on one arm. I was distracted by his AWFUL moustache and greeted him with a tentative hug before saying, "Um Gus.. You've got a.. You've got something on.. On your face.." whilst gesticulating to my upper lip. His shoulders sagged in a way that screamed 'FML' but I still got plenty of loving from him. I noticed they now have a lush pair of gloves as merchandise. Someone get me a pair for Christmas plsssss!! Fanks. Back out in the corridor after I'd chatted to Gus, we all started larking around with some fake moustaches that Lozz and I had bought especially for the gig. Carrie put her one (a straight brown one) on her face and I said, "Gus, is that you?? Gustache!?" Was hilarious, thanks.

So, anyway, the first support act -- Minutes, I think they were called -- were actually UH-mazing. Lozz, Carrie and I were soon bopping along, right at the barrier, and pulling faces at the band whilst putting our moustaches on our faces. Their guitarist looked like Anthony Head But Younger and Lozz and I spent a lot of time shouting, "NAAAAAKEEEEEEDDDD!!" at him, as we do. At one point during Minutes' set, I noticed that Johnny, Bean and Frase were by the side of the stage, laughing at my moustache. Excellent!
In between the two support acts, a bunch of sound guys and roadies slammed onto the stage to change the equipment; obviously YG's sound guy, Emre, was present. I said, "Emre! He texted me once!" and we all laughed and started yelling, "EMRE!!! FUCK YEAH EMRE SOUND!!! WE LOVE YOU!!! WOOOOO!!!" and he was absolutely pissing himself with laughter; the drummer from the next support act was encouraging us to continue, which we did with gusto. So an Emre fan alliance was birthed at this point, I enjoyed this very much.
I can't remember the name of the second support act; I'll have to find it out. They were pretty good though; their lead singer had a flat cap on and Lozz quoted the Boosh: "*in a Chav voice* CAN MAH M8 RRRRICKY TRY ON YOUR HAT? 'E LYKS IT!" Omg.. It was so good. I waved at Gus at the side of the stage, and he made a heart with his hands. I also smiled at Si, who grinned at me. Corr. And he pouted at me when I put my moustache on. Saucy minx.
After the second support were done.. There was another Emre moment, which I loved. We did some frantic gesturing at our (fake) moustaches; he put his thumb up and gestured to his own (real) moustache. A lot of "EMREEEE!!" followed this. As we were waiting for YG to come on, some guy shouted, "COME ON GREEN DAY!!" I had to turn around and 'Eiffel Tower' him (a really high high-five, the idea of which I stole from The IT Crowd). We stuck our fake moustaches on in preparation and waited.

As usual, Young Guns' set was absolutely bitchin' -- I have a copy of the set list, after calling a roadie that looked like Lil Chris (and whose name turned out to be Chris X__X) a 'motherfucker' and insisting he gave me a set list. I got Fraser's one :) They played, in this order: Sons Of Apathy, Elements, In The Night, Winter Kiss, Meter & Verse, DOA, Stitches, Crystal Clear, Beneath The Waves, There Will Be Rain and Daughter Of The Sea, with At The Gates and Weight Of The World as encore songs. Ohhhhhh. And I can remember some of the cool things that happened during some of the songs, so here's a list for you to feast upon:

>> In The Night -- Si tried to stand on one of the boxes on stage and fell off it -- he landed on his feet, but did a shifty did-anybody-see-that look. He spotted Lozz and I cracking up in front of him and ran off laughing his head off. Amazing. Gus kept coming over during this song and singing at us, so I sung the lyric 'You are the sun' at him, cause he lights up my life. Ahh, isn't that naaaice D:
>> DOA -- I put my middle finger up at Si, who pulled a face. And I blew a kiss at Gus, who kissed his hand and flung it out at me. Ohhh.
>> Crystal Clear -- There's a lyric in this song that goes 'Given time coastlines will change, so why won't you?' and Gus pointed at Johnny as he sung it. Lozz and I gawped at each other, like OMG FAGDOM. Corr.
>> There Will Be Rain -- Si kept coming over to sing the chorus at us, yessssssss!
>> At The Gates -- I choked up during this song, but I didn't actually cry, which was good. I sung the line 'I am not afraid' at Gus and at Simon, corrr. It was wonderful. For some reason, G + S were really interactive with us during the set, and Bean kept laughing at our moustaches.
>> Weight Of The World -- (Instead of 'I will carry it for you') "I will carry it for FRASE!!" I am genius. Fraser heard me and smiled slightly. I loved it. The slag.

Anyway, as I said, the said was amaaaaaaazing and Gus' voice :o Ho-ly shitsauce. His voice has gotten so strong and so pure and they're still getting better every time I see them and ahhhheigheoenboiviubspg. After they'd left the stage, Lozz, Carrie and I shouted, "EMRE!!!!!" for a while XD Oh and I have to make a note about the fangirls behind us. It really annoyed me; the only songs they sung to were Sons Of Apathy, Winter Kiss, Crystal Clear and Weight Of The World. If you don't understand the relevance -- basically, those are the songs that have been released as singles. They knew NONE of the other tracks from the album and NONE of the old stuff. I hate fangirls, they think they're so die-hard but surely if they were that much of a fan they'd you know.. KNOW THE WORDS TO THE SONGS. Faggots.
Anyway, we stumbled out to where the merch was and I leant against a wall with my silver moustache on while Lozz went into the toilets to sort one of her contacts out. Suddenly, I saw her arm come out of the door and point at me, and who should come out of the toilets but Maggie!! She rushed over to me and scooped me up into a hug and I was like "Ahhhh omg you're sooo pretty!!" before I could stop myself X___X I was chatting to her about Johnny being grumpy, and the moustaches, and how life was going. Then Loren (Gus' girlfriend) came out of the toilets, lugging all of Maggie's stuff (which she'd left in the toilets XD) and Maggie introduced us properly and we all chatted about Gus' awful moustache and how 'European' he looks, and how you can never get Fraser to shut up :D Eeeee, I love them both and all the fangirls were glaring at me after, har har.

We got bored of waiting around inside, so we went out around the back to have a quick chat to the guys when they came out to load their van. We kicked a massive chunk of road about for a bit, like football, and -- when the guys from the support acts started coming out, lugging gear -- we were standing there being condescending ("Don't strain yourself.. Good effort! Well done.." and singing 'Macho Man' at them) We also met Petey Passion (the guy next to my picture on the My Passion Fashion site) who I'd seen at My Passion gigs and heard of. He was really lovely. We also met a man from one of the support acts, who we nicknamed Tinnitus King, cause he did a good impression of the sound tinnitus makes -_-' He was excellent; he let me poke him in different parts of his torso and arms to see if he made a different noise with every poke (he did!) and he was fucking excellent. But he touched my hair, so I booted him.

Unfortunately, we didn't really get to see the guys for long, cause we weren't inside and we caught them just before they (and we) left. I didn't get photos with Johnny (so no hideous faces :( Sad times!) cause he was just really tired and I didn't really want to bother him. And I didn't get a photo with Gus cause his moustache genuinely makes me nervous. I did fight with Si though; I tried to steal his hoodie string and he wrenched away going, "AHH!! You bitch!!" so I pushed him and said, "WOT!? You WOTTT!?" he loved it, he laughed like a maniac. And he called Lozz a 'cheeky bitch' cause she called him an 'Oriental bastard' :D I was chatting about how I had a 'halfwit smile' and turned to face Bean as I said it, so it looked like I was talking about him. I was like, "Ohh I'm sorry!" He was wearing his quilted coat and looked gorgeous. I told him the story of our financial woes and he was vair sympathetic of our plight which was lovely of him. We went over to Frase and Si got in my way so I yelled, "OMG MOVE!! YOU'RE JUST IN THE WAY!!" at him. Everyone sniggered and he pulled a face at me. I wrenched Fraser's head to the side to look at the tattoo of an anchor he's got behind his ear; he said, "ALRIGHT!" as I was rather violent about it. I cooed over it for some time before searching his hand for his tiny, drawn-in-biro-by-a-five-year-old anchor on his finger. I found it and stroked it for some time, before I realised he was giving me a funny look XD I told him his moustache was better than Johnny's. And Petey Passion walked Lozz and halfway to our hotel and kept his arm around me for warmth as I was freezing my bollocks off. Our hotel room was extremely warm when we got in, bliss!

Now, I shall go on to the Gloucester times the day after the gig. This blog has been shit; I really should've made a draft right after the gig, but noo. I left it for days and have probably missed loads of stuff out. Cocktails.

-- Kayleigh

Here's the picture page! They're not all from the Gloucester times, there's some other miscellaneous ones as well. They're all funny though so enjoy!!

SGL HIATUS

2010-11-12T17:32:00.000-08:00

For a week or so. Means all of you that read this (yes, all one of you X___X) will have to wait for any blogs and/or THE YOUNG GUNS BLOG. Umm.. Yeah, not gonna draw this out. Don't miss me too much.

"Can I play with the brain cause I'm finished?"

2010-11-11T19:04:00.000-08:00

I spent Geoggers listening to Chav Jack talk about running his friend over. And in the break, Lozz tipped loads of bashed up cookies onto the table in the library in front of Mullins and we did a runner to the tune of 'Just A Rascal' by Dizzee Rascal XD Cause that's the perfect doing-a-runner music.

Psychology with Martha was MINT. I love that lesson sfm! Martha picked on me to answer a question and I said, "Ohh, don't do this to me!", making everyone laugh. And she was stupid enough to use the word 'soul' so Lozz and I burst forth with a Cecil-off-SAW quote: "I don't have a fucking soul!!" Then I got an answer (about post-mortem brain study, morbidly) right, and said ,"Booyah!" really loudly. Martha asked who hadn't been picked on to answer a question and I pointed mutely at Lozz, who punched me XD Then we were talking about somatic ... Something, I can't remember, and one of the things it did was senses. Martha asked for another thing, and Buff Kieran said, "Auditory!" I swung around in my seat and shouted, "THAT'S A SENSE, KIERAN." Ohhh. And Martha was talking right at him for ages (like teachers do to annoy people); he just looked around the room at everyone with a really terrified expression on his face. I loved it. Martha said, "And that gets information from our.." and trailed off like teachers do when they want you to finish the sentence. I said, "Mum?" and I think Lozz nearly had a stroke laughing at it. Martha had been showing us a plastic model of a brain (THAT YOU COULD TAKE APART!! AAAAHH!!) and I'd finished my work so I asked, "Can I play with the brain cause I'm finished?" -- so Lozz and I played with the brain.

As for my journey to town, I'll sum it up in an equation:
Packed bus + criminally insane driver
= EXTREME BUS SURFING

It's 5 days til I see Young Guns again. Holy shit.

-- Kayleigh

"I can't believe he fell for the soup!"

2010-11-10T17:15:00.000-08:00

Yesterday got off to a good start when I heard Mutti singing 'Billionaire' by Travie McCoy feat. Bruno Mars downstairs. But instead of singing 'Smiling next to Oprah and the Queen', she sang 'Smiling next to Oprah and a spleen' -- I honestly nearly died laughing. Then she noticed that about five pairs of my shoes were downstairs and said, "Kayleigh your shoes are re-appearing avenged sevenfold." Instead of just saying 'sevenfold' -- oh I love her!
At the bus stop, true to English form, an old woman started chatting to me about the weather and how cold it was before complimenting my big orange scarf. I was proud of myself.
In Psychology, we were looking at really old kids' books to illustrate gender stereotypes. The one Lozz, Tanya and I were looking at was called 'A Pram And A Bicycle' and it was basically 'Jane' had a pram to play with and 'John' was playing on his bike. I got asked to give feedback on the stereotypes in the book. I said, "Well Jane thinks her doll is a real baby called Paul and she puts 'him' in dresses.. Um.. She's a bit screwed up. John's riding his bike all over the place, even down hills cause he's badass. Then he gets ice-cream which is even cooler.. Oh, and he's gay." Jen said, "Does it actually say that?" in a sceptic tone, thinking I was being silly. I read out the bit that had the word 'gay' in it (but gay meaning happy ofc XD) and then held the book up for the class to see. As I was giving all the feedback, everyone was laughing. I felt so popular and leet for a while. And I hit Lozz's pencilcase nonchalently off her desk in retaliation for her prodding me endlessly. Also, Lozz and I walked past Mix Of Everything; she said, "I LOVE YOU." I said, "NAKED." Gutted at him.

And last night, Frank, Lozz and I went to see Jackass 3D. It is SO funny. I didn't stop laughing, even when it started to hurt XD The title quote of this blog post is from it, and Steve-O has gotten soooo hot!! Ohhh :')

The best thing about today was seeing SAW again! It was just Lozz and I and five other people in the screen room, so we got away with shouting, "SEXY!!" every time Hoffman or Dr Gordon was on the screen. Excellent! I do love that film, even if it is verging on ridiculous!

-- Kayleigh

"Oh, you are gorgeous!"

2010-11-09T09:51:00.000-08:00

Three highlights from yestertag:

>> I was outside Jason's Psychology class, and Buff Kieran strolled past on his way into the lesson; I was chatting to Lozz about something and ended up like this, "[talking about other stuff] and oh, you are gorgeous!" -- Lozz reckons he heard me. I like to think so.

>> Nice Face walked past outside during the break (yesterday morning, it was like a tornado and a tsunami was happening outside, then by my break it was nice and sunny, so Lozz and I were outside making the most of it) and Lozz and I were shouting things like, "You're fit!" "I fancy you!" and "Get naked!" Ohhh, it was funny. I hope he heard.

>> Finally, Lozz shouted at a kid in a Chav voice, "I LIKE YO HAIR!" he didn't answer so she added, "FOCK YOU DEN!!" I laughed for like ten minutes. Ohh outrage!

Should be going to see Jackass 3D today with Frank and Lozz. Oooooh, JOHNNY KNOXVILLE ON A MASSIVE SCREEN, IN 3D. NOT TO MENTION CHRIS PONTIUS AND STEVE-O!!!

-- Kayleigh

P.S. Mutti has just informed me that Martin uses the word 'windowlicker' now XD

YES LIAM!!

2010-11-06T16:06:00.000-07:00

He's just gotten back from Germany, and came into my room and said to me, "I saw a music video on TV yesterday. I thought I recognised the guy singing, and it turned out to be Young Guns. I really liked the song, Weight of the World." I was like AAAAAAAAAAAH!! My brother is the best, no?

Also, SAW was amazing last night; it was amazing and infuriating all at once, and Hoffman is still sexay; I don't care what anyone says!! And I'm seeing it again on Wednesday with Lozz and I'm going to the cinema on Tuesday with Frank to watch Jackass 3D -- wheeee!!

-- Kayleigh

Intellect

2010-11-05T17:55:00.000-07:00

I read Stephen King's 'IT' on the bus today (I'm reading it for the seventh time). I felt very intelligent, seeing as it's over 900 pages long XD Also, I laughed til it hurt in my break today cause Freya punched her phone across the canteen.

Going to see SAW 7 (I absolutely refuse to call it SAW 3D) tonight!!

:')

2010-11-04T18:22:00.000-07:00

Buff Kieran was such comedy value today! In A2 Psychology, we've started Schizophrenia & Mood Disorders and Jen was on about how a symptom of schizophrenia is delusions of grandeur; she said, "For example, thinking you're God." Buff Kieran said, "Me!" and I was the only one that found it funny; I don't even know if anyone else heard. So, I loved him enough. Then in Martha's lesson, she pointed at me and said I should know the name for chemicals in the brain (neuro-transmitters) -- I said, "WHY SHOULD I KNOW!?!" and she said, "Cause you're fast-tracking!" I pointed wildly at BK and shouted, "SO IS HE!!" and he was like X__X cause Martha started picking on him; he said, "But I don't listen." and everyone laughed. Then Martha asked how long a man is involved in the upbringing of a kid; BK said, "Three minutes." and everyone loled and started asking if that's how shortly he lasted. Lozz said she was disappointed XD When Martha mentioned kids, he said 'urgh' and when she said a man's natural instinct is to inseminate as many women as possible, he said, "Ayyy!" and it was excellent.

Other funny things to happen are as follows. Martha accidentally called Keira 'Kayleigh' and she was like, "WOT." I said, "Martha, you always have a go at me, so you should know who's Kayleigh by now!" everyone laughed. And she said, "Brown Charlotte." (meaning Charlotte with brown hair) to answer a question and Lozz and I went "Ohhh." and everyone laughed again; Martha quickly revised it to 'Brunette Charlotte'. Then Lozz and I were playing Outrage! and Phish Food was in hysterics when I was like "YOU WON GARY NUMAN, THE SPIRIT OF JAZZ, AND BLACK FROST FROM ME!!" It was greeeeattt!!

Also today..
LOZZ BOUGHT MURDERDOLLS TICKETS FOR FEBRUARY!! FUCKIN A!!

-- Kayleigh

Camden Town

2010-11-03T21:49:00.000-07:00

Lozz and I had a nice time on Monday, browsing the markets and shops at Camden. I came away with some tortoise-shell glasses, blue hair dye and an absolutely gorgeous pocket watch. So I was chuffed to bits with that. There was a shop absolutely stuffed with amazing Steampunk gear, and I nearly died. I wish I was rich, so I could dress like a cog-laden Victorian pimp forever :( Honestly, there's not an awful lot to say about what we did in Camden, cause we literally just had a nice time wandering around and absorbing the culture. I ate the best KFC of my life there and there was an amazing middle-aged man with black and white hair and awesome clothes. I told him I loved his hair and he thanked me, before eyeing my hair with interest. Excellent. I genuinely felt boring there. Sad times!!

Um.. Tuesday was naff.

Today was alright. While Lozz and I were playing Outrage on a bench outside, an aggressively happy girl bounded over and asked us if we'd like some smores and hot chocolate. I said, "How much?" and she said, "Free!" -- this is why sometimes, just sometimes, I adore my college.

-- Kayleigh

P.S. Because it's Faith Week at college, they had a board up asking us what we think faith is. Here's my answer:
P.P.S. And here's me in my new My Passion tour t-shirt (it has the dates of the tour on the back of it!):

MY PASSION 4

2010-11-03T21:39:00.000-07:00

So we got to our hotel in Landaaaan without a hitch (infact, we got there fifteen minutes earlier than we'd expected!). We saw a GORGEOUS guy, first in Swindon station, then in Paddington; he was tall with dark hair and wore a shirt and skinnies, with a hat and AMAZING BROGUES. Ohhhh. I said, "Hel-lo beautiful! I love your shoes!" and he said thanks and I died. We also saw Owen off None The Less which was lovely. We lazed about for a bit, throwing our stuff around the room and drinking SoCo with lemon & lime with The Mummy on the TV. Eventually we dragged ourselves up and got dressed up, me as an autopsy, Lozz as a zombie. Lana's dad came and picked us up, and so I met him, Lana and her sister Jade. FINALLY!! I GOT TO HANG OUT WITH LANA!! We had to wait for a million years outside the venue, but Lozz and I amused ourselves by putting fake blood on Lana and throwing glowing objects around.

We got into the merch/bar area of the venue and Andy.. Was dressed as a nun. With massive tits. I said, "Corrr, Andy!!" and he smiled at me. When I later saw him in the sound bit of the live room, I said, "You turned down my Facebook proposal. I asked you to marry me, via picture comment, on Facebook -- I couldn't have been more sincere!" Andy said, "I can't accept proposals!! I'm sorry!!" I just pretended to be really upset. He said, "At least I told you outright that I couldn't and didn't lie to you.. At least I was honest, otherwise I could've broken your heart more." Ohh it was so funny, so I hugged him and got blood all over his nun's attire. Excellent!! Worryingly, there were lots of cross-dressing guys XD
During the break between Don Broco (who weren't amazing) and Dead By April (who were MIND-BLOWING), some bare Halloween tunez came on, including 'Thriller', 'Ghostbusters' and 'Ghost Town' -- so naturally, everyone was singing and dancing! During 'Ghostbusters', two guys who were dressed as the Ghostbusters got invited on stage to dance for a bit. Was hilarious! Lozz kept shouting "Mark I love you!!" at Mark the Sound Guy, and it just got so funny. It got so funny that it started hurting. One of the guys in Dead By April is bufftingaling, so there was a lot of "SEX!!" "TROUSER SNAKE!!" and "NAKED!!" being shouted at him XD We're such yobs, it's amusing.

My Passion though.. They walked onto the stage in nothing but jeans (and -- in Jonny G's case -- shorts with TIGHTS) and black glittery body paint. Click here to see what I mean. Oh my goodness, I nearly died. Was NOT expecting that at all!! Their set was amazing and we were dancing like mad for the whole thing; we screamed along to 'Day of the Bees', of course singing my version 'Day of the John Bees'. And I made a heart at John Be and got one back. Ohhh.
Afterwards, I managed to collar Laurence before the mental 15-year-old fangirls noticed him and chatted to him for a bit (whilst getting one of his amazing strong cuddles); I told him I missed him etc, but I did threaten him as usual, which he loved, the slag. I made him wear my pumpkin glasses (there is a photo, don't panic), and then the fangirls descended so I tried to get out of the way. I ended up being properly shoved into Jamie (after he waded through the crowds, shouting "GET ME A FUCKING T-SHIRT!!" cause he was, like, nearly naked -- HOH!), and had to hold his shoulders to stop myself from being pushed right over. Honestly, some of the pathetic children there were psychotic; the guys were almost flattened by them. I've never seen that at a My Passion gig before, bunch of idiots. Anyway, Jamie was lovely about the fact I was basically clinging to him to stop myself from being flattened and he looked genuinely terrified XD Jonny G shouted hi at me and Simon looked fucking terrified at it all (I didn't get a photo with Jonny G or Simon, which I was gutted about, but they were getting absolutely swamped by hysterical 15-year-olds X___X) We decided to go out to the back and wait until they came outside, something the fangirls didn't think of doing, and on the way out we bumped into John Be who had been skulking quietly on the other side of the room. I loved this. I grabbed his hands and exclaimed over how filthy they were from all the black paint, and his put his hand on my head. He is so lucky I love him or I would've killed him for touching my hair. I gave him my bumblebee necklace; he tilted his head back so that I'd put it on him then he said, "Awww, it's a little bee!" and I was like, "Yeah, I thought it'd be funny to give you it cause like.. You're Be, and it's a bee.. And I love you." He made me fall for him all over again, I just wanted to steal him. Oh, and the paint had made his hair dark grey (as you'll see in the pics XD)

While we were waiting outside, there were a few choice characters that I have to list because they were amusing, terrifying or amusing and terrifying:
>> Pumpkin Man: He had a really awful mask on, that was like some sort of diseased pumpkin, and I turned around to find him right in my grill!! I screamed so loud and he found it hilarious. Later on, I looked over at him and he had lifted his mask up and was waving his beer at me and grinning. Oh my God.
>> Gus and Johnny's lovechild: This guy honestly looked like what would happen if Gus and Johnny from Young Guns had a baby together. He was a perfect blend of both of them! So you can imagine how gorgeous he was XD
>> Hot Dog: A guy. Dressed as a hot dog. I shouted, "OMG it's a hot dog!!" and he turned around, looking really stoned (which he probably was) and put his thumb up.
>> Scooby: A guy dressed as Scooby Doo, who stumbled out of the bar with his mate who was 'dressed like a paki' (according to Lozz); we started singing the Scooby Doo theme at him and Lozz said she loved him. He turned and smiled and waved, which was excellent.
>> Drunk Jack Sparrow: There's always one. ALWAYS.
>> Droog: He mushed past dressed as Alex from A Clockwork Orange. Excellent.
>> Man With Fairy Lights: I didn't understand him at all. He was sat in the bar, with no costume on. He just had a string of red fairy lights around his head and neck XD
Also while we were waiting, Gabby came over and had a chat with me. She was dressed as Snow White and told me about how Andy had called her up and asked if she has a bra. This made me laugh, as it turns out that -- underneath his nun attire -- Andy had Gabby's bra with a My Passion t-shirt in each cup on. Hahahaha oh my God. It was brilliant.
My Passion eventually came out to start loading their van up; cue lots of jeering and catcalling. Jamie came over for a chit-chat with us, which was cute. He said, "I haven't got my tunnels in. It's disgusting!" when I asked how big his ears were stretched to. He is so fucking cute, it's unbelievable. Totally fits in with My Passion! Some mimes with white contact lenses came up to Laurence and asked him how to get into the bar; he looked extremely startled and couldn't seem to answer, so Stape told them and they mimed off. Laurence was chatting to a girl near me, then looked towards me; I put my hand over my eye and went, "OWCH!!" like he'd just poked me in the eye with his nose. He was about two metres away. Lozz found this very amusing. When we decided to leave, we gave Laurence a great big hug each, bought massive bottles of Volvic Touch Of Fruit water and caught the night bus back to our hotel. EXCELLENT GIG. EXCELLENT.

Click here for the pictures! Trust me, they are amusing (as usual!). I think I'll make a new post for my blog about the day after Halloween cause this one got a bit out of hand :D

-- Kayleigh

Guess Who I'm Seeing Tomorrow!

2010-10-30T12:16:00.000-07:00

Here's a clue:

3 Days Til Halloween

2010-10-28T12:36:00.000-07:00

Ohhhh my goodness!! I have been slacking on this blog, I really have. Not that anyone gives a crap; my life's not really of any interest to anyone. The truth is that I haven't really gone anywhere interesting, or done anything fun. At the moment, I should be doing some Media coursework but I really don't have the motivation. If I don't do it though, I'll fail. Arrrgh, I'd like to say I don't care, but unfortunately I do this year. Tonight, we're all going out for dinner and meeting Liam's girlfriend for the first time -- awkward much. Tomorrow I am resting up and blitzing myself in an attempt to look perfect on Sunday. On Saturday, I am getting Lozz from work and maybe buying some flamingo pink hairdye. And then on Sunday.. TRAINS, TUBES, HOTELS AND MY PASSION!! AHHHHH!! Dressing up as an autopsy and SEEING LANA!! WOO!!

Hmmm, also everybody go here and vote for Young Guns in Best Band, Best Live Band, Best Album, Best everything. And Gustav Wood in Sexiest Female. And all fucking five of them in Sexiest Male. Do it. Do it 2846348337 times. Merci.

-- Kayleigh

Paranormal Activity 2

2010-10-25T19:58:00.000-07:00

So I went to watch it today with Frank. Umm.. Put it this way, if you want a laugh -- go see it. If you're looking for something scary, I wouldn't bother wasting your money on this film. It was codswallop. All I can say is that at least it was better than the first one. Lots more things happen in this one, and there's lots of jumpy bits. The entire screen room was in stitches for most of the film; I'm not sure that the makers intended it to be funny, but it really was. I might get it on DVD just to relive the lolz. It was still repetitive and un-scary, but it was entertaining at least. I immediately lost hope at the beginning when a subtitle came up and said "The makers would like to thank the family of the deceased and the police of [wherever this is meant to be set]" -- I hate the fact that they're still trying to claim it's a true story. Shut up.

Anyway, I enjoyed myself and Frank bought me KFC. Love him.

-- Kayleigh

Nanny Jean

2010-10-23T20:34:00.000-07:00

is amazing. Liam and I went to visit her tonight, as a surprise, and she loved it. She is trying to offer me £500 to go towards a laptop, her defence being that, if she dies, I won't get anything from her because she wrote her will when she had nothing. I feel bad for this, because I don't know if I can take £500 from an old woman whom I love an awful lot, but she is adamant that she should be the one to buy me a laptop. Unfortunately, I've already started planning how I'd use all the money I'm getting, and the plans involve a Henry Holland laptop bag. Ohh, I'm so material :( Anyway, she was watching the football and said about my Vati's thoughts on some footballer, "He thinks the sun shines out of his posterior." I love her sfm. She called her late husband a 'rotten crook' for dying, and said that one of the footballers needed to cut his hair because his hair was the reason he kept falling over ("He's top heavy!!"). How I laughed! She also kept calling various football players clots when they fucked up. Ohh, she's amazing!!

Liam and I got to her house by driving in Liam's (brand new and very swish) Renault Clio. It's white with black alloys and the seatbelts are a silvery colour. The seats are sooo cushty and it makes the most beautiful sound. I love it! I felt well stylish, but it made me wish I could drive too!!

I can't believe Nanny Jean is offering me £500 O__O
Should I take it? Or haggle it down to a smaller amount?

-- Kayleigh

Have Some Pictures

2010-10-23T16:47:00.000-07:00

My beautiful Henry Holland bracelet:

Me, today, looking horrid:

The glow-in-the-dark handcuffs Lozz got me for Halloween:

OVERHEARD #13

2010-10-22T20:55:00.000-07:00

I haven't blogged since Tuesday. This is because I have had a shocker of a week and I am now very glad to see the back of it. The worst part of this horrible week is that it's not really blogworthy, so it won't even make for entertaining reading. This is why I did not bother. Have an Overheard list instead:

-- That's cause I'm a complete numpty.
-- Britney randomly punched me at the bus stop today.
-- That girl that wears, like, arab scarves.
-- My face is on fire!
-- Walked up to Old Town, got fucked, walked down from Old Town.
-- Mate, I swear your house was on fire when I drove past it last night!
-- Do you like my bling ring? I got it from the 99p Store!
-- People take canoes to Glastonbury!
-- Oh, I got cheese on my phone.
-- That woman needs a belly bra!
-- The Jews don't have any more money than I do!
-- My hefty balls in my big bag -- that's what I sing.
-- Bring me back some chicken too!

I got myself some test tube shaped shot glasses today and a CREEPY EYE CLUSTER FROM ASDA!! They're doing them again cause it's Halloween in nine days(!!!!!!), I am so excited for My Passion. Most importantly, though, I am alive.

-- Kayleigh

Two Highlights Of Today

2010-10-19T20:43:00.000-07:00

>> Someone drove by with the Pokémon theme blaring out from their car. I was puce with the effort of not laughing whilst alone.
>> I kept making sassy comments at Gorgeous Bill in Lozz's Photography class, and he kept laughing and smiling at said comments. Ohhh :')

"Ironically, the dyke is straight!"

2010-10-18T23:36:00.000-07:00

As usual in Media, Maggie was being horrid as soon as we walked in. She was going on and on about This Is England, as usual, and was on about us making sure we knew a few scenes really well for the exam; Mo muttered angrily, "I have the fucking DVD at home so I can watch it whenever I fucking want." and it just amused me cause of the way he said it. We were forced to watch the original Swedish version of Let The Right One In, and I sung part of William Control's 'I'm Only Human Sometimes' ("All I have to do, is let the right one in!!") -- the next line is, "I'm only human sometimes." but Mo decided to SAY to the tune, "I'm not human at all." and I laughed. Then Maggie was trying to decide how best to make notes and read the subtitles on the film at the same time. She thought aloud, "I could pause it every now and then.." and Mo said, "Or we could just watch it. Instead of pausing every scene. NEEDLESSLY." Ohhhh, my sides!! In the film, a little boy decided to start stabbing a tree and asking what the tree was looking at; I said, "It's a tree, honey." and in a bit where he's in PE, he's wearing a V-neck. I said, "Nice V-neck, idiot.." then added, "Ben Jolliffe!?" as an afterthought XD Ohhh, it was a good film though.
Lozz gave me a packet of Vimto bon-bons before Psychology. Fucking succeed. One of these bon-bons got WASTED in Geoggers though cause Chav Jack decided he wanted one. I asked him if he could catch before throwing one across the room. He cannot catch. Fortunately the bon-bon struck his nail and hurt him. Dave was rambling on about a piece of granite he used as a doorstop and how someone had nicked it. I said incredulously, "Who the fuck would steal a lump of rock!?" Then we were learning about things called dykes underneath the surface of the earth; they're vertical, and Stacey said, "Ironically, the dyke is straight!" -- that is how I will remember that fact for the rest of my life now. Dave asked why we have no active volcanoes in England these days; I said, "Cause we're stupid." and Stacey thought it was the best answer ever. She was also gobsmacked when she found out that I have a Top 5 Worst Ways To Die list (If you're interested: Burning, drowning, smothering, long illnesses and being eaten).

Afterwards Lozz and Gina picked me up, and they were both pulling angler fish faces out of the window -_-' We thought we saw Boris Johnson at the garage, but it was just a woman. And we crimped in the middle of a Chinese place, which was amusing, and Lozz called Shaun Crahan (Clown off Slipknot) 'Shaun Crayon' and I drew a picture of this. Gina told me I'm like the gay son she never had, which made me happy, and while she was in the Chinese, Lozz and I took the handbrake off and moved the car to the other side of the Chinese, going the wrong way up a one-way street, and she didn't even notice. She actually went towards where the car should've been, and looked confused for an age before noticing we'd moved it. Lozz and I were dancing to a bang-out tune that featured one lyric: Barbra Streisand. That's IT. Click here if you REALLY want to hear it. And we had a 'roof picnic' with no food while Gina was in Sainsburys (winding the car windows all the way down and sitting where the windows should be, using the car roof as a table) -- good times!

-- Kayleigh

THE LIGHT DIVIDED

2010-10-14T21:20:00.000-07:00

We were standing at the bar in 12Bar (after laughing hysterically at the fact that the arrow for the ladies toilets also points to the pub garden so the sign says 'Ladies Garden' hehehehee) and Dave walked out. He was on his way to get something from the van, but made a detour to speak to us. I had been telling Lozz about my hamster playing on my shoes, and was just in the process of showing her a picture; Dave had a look and I said, "Why are you getting involved?" He did look rather lovely though, and called Mo ginger, which was amusing. This was before Mo had even turned up! XD Then he was wondering aloud how to get out to the van; I said, "Doors, Dave. You push them and they open." he found this too funny. Also while Lozz and I were sat in the bar, there was a guy we called Hugh Grant, so there was a lot of "Oy, Hugh! ..Hugh, though!" going on. Unfortunately we were rather excitable. We were waiting for Dan to come out and say hi cause I'd texted him and Lozz said, "Oh come on, FLAN." when he took ages; was hilarious. Eventually, all of the guys came and sat their asses down at our table for a quick chat before they went to get some food; after they'd gone we made friends with the girls on the next table. Unfortunately, one of them was drunk and managed to dislocate her knee and was rushed off in an ambulance; one of the other girls went with her and so we were left with the last one, Leah, who decided to stay. She was lovely!! You'll hear lots about her in this blog entry. I think, to break it all up (and because I can hardly remember the order of all the things that happened), I shall make a LIST!!!! Ohh, I know. You're all excited now!

>> Out in the bar, the lovely Chris bought me a Malibu & coke as he promised, and we were all bullying him into drinking more than his JD & coke (which I kept stealing with my handy straw); Leah kept buying rounds of these mad shots with cream on top. They were excellent! And for some reason, when Chris and I were hugging and chatting, we did an excited-grasping-of-each-others'-knees scenario. Most strange!

>> I got crotched by Dan, when he came to join the shits and giggles going on in the bar. And I tried to trip him up, and nearly succeeded!! It was at this point that the face-squishing times began.

>> The face squishing: I repeatedly squished all of TLD's faces. For no reason. They pulled the most horrific expressions every time I did this, which made it even more fun.

>> When we got into the actual venue bit, Danny was on the till at the door, checking tickets etc. I glomped him as I hadn't given him any loving yet, and we were all playing with the till -- by this, I mean we were all pressing the button to open the till drawer and it was really fun, for no reason. I told Danny that his bandmates keep telling me he's gay. He said, "Ohh, emm, geee. Double-you.. Teee.. Eff. EFF EM ELL!!" and I said, "Pee exclamation mark ay tee dee." He said, "What's that?" I said, "Um.. Panic! At The Disco." "Oh yeah." Hahaha, then I stole his scarf, and declared that he is now my 'favourite one'.

>> We shortly moved over to the merch table, where Danny and Lozz each sat on a sit and I sat on Danny's knee, which was comfy and intrusive. Which I enjoyed.

>> For no reason, Danny asked me to show him where a cashpoint was. I took him outside to walk him to one, and Dave came with us. I don't know why. Danny ran off around a corner and Dave said, "Oh fuck sake, I know what he's gonna do -- he's gonna jump out at us." I said, "Just run around the corner and scream at him." Dave said, "I'll just walk with my fist out and punch him." They veered off in the wrong direction and I said, "No, that's the way to the gay bar, not the cashpoint! I know you guys are attracted to the gay, but.." On the way back, they were talking about penis sizes (......) and I asked Danny to carry me cause I 'couldn't be fucked to walk'. He did for a bit, which was lovely of him. He must be very strong. Then Dave was trying to become my favourite by saying, "...You look gorgeous tonight." to me. Sorry Dave, Danny's still my favourite one!

>> The Gay Times: Ok, I said YG are the gayest band I know. Scratch that. TLD completely blow that out of the water. They are sooooo gay, with crotch fumblings and massages and bummings and dirty dancings and 'I touched the end of it once by accident' -- ohhh lol! Dan kept putting his hand down his trousers then wiping his hand on Danny's face; he got Lozz and I in absolute stitches. Unfortunately, I think that encouraged him cause he kept doing it XD

>> While the guys were on stage: We all perved Dave's guitar, cause it was beautiful -- Lozz actually leaned up and kissed it at one point. Dave didn't mind. We kept making hearts and shouting 'BUFF!' and 'NAKED!' when it was quiet. I walked calmly up the stairs just to stroke Danny's chest hair, and Lozz, Leah and I kept dancing madly for the whole set, like a bunch of depraveds. That's not a word. Get over it. Mo and I did the Rik Mayall dance (don't worry if you don't know what that is; just know that it's hilarious!) and our impressions of Combo from This Is England.

>> Throughout TLD's set (and afterwards!!), Leah kept buying us all drinks and shots. I love her soo much; she made the night hilarious! Especially when she dropped her TLD CD on the floor and I screamed and took a photo of it XD And I said to Danny, "Pick please!" and he gave me his pick. Eeee, it's been in his mouth and everything. Oh.

>> For no reason, Danny picked me up and carried me onto the stage, before setting me down and saying I could help them pack away. I said, "No." And for no reason, Dan motorboated Leah. That was hilarious because Dave said, "Dan.. She meant shake her hand. It's an executive term." and everyone laughed.

>> I told Dan to suck my dick (as I say to everyone) and he said, "Present it then!" Dave said, "I'D suck your dick if you had one!" I said, "Likewise, Dave." And I booted him really hard in the leg for touching my hair uninvited. I hear that he is still crippled today :)

>> Also, Danny called me hot, and they all blew kisses and waved as they drove off. Eeeeeee, love fest!! Then Dan texted me for the next half hour, so I felt even more adored :D

So that was a sum-up of the AMAZING NIGHT -- click here for the amusing photos (I know it's a Facebook album, but it's a public link, so take a look! Also, it's the first 19 photos that are from last night)!! I love them. I bet I've missed out so much stuff :( But I'm having difficulty staying awake, cause I'm stuffed full of KFC and really tired. The three top moments of today were: being woken up by Mook, getting recognition from Buff Kieran (and SMILES!!), and walking to town with Danny/Venus, my flouncing gay boy. Gorgeous!

-- Kayleigh

Quick One About Yesterday

2010-10-14T12:19:00.000-07:00

>> Lozz told me that -- on The Cleveland Show -- there was an obviously gay (male) toddler on rollerskates with black and pink hair. And that Kevin said it was me. Cheers then! Apparently, I will agree when I see what it looks like. I hope so!
>> Annoying Guy in Psychology was talking about something to do with rape and sex (I know, what a weirdo) and I got so annoyed that I said, "Oh shut up, you don't even know what sex is!!" and made Lozz laugh too much.
>> After Psychology, Buff Kieran complimented my jacket when I said I liked his hoodie. I melted to the floor for quite some time.
>> All I ate yesterday was 'beans and little sausages' and some cheese; probably not the best idea seeing as I managed to drink quite a lot last night (but wait for the gig blog to hear all about that XD). I didn't want the last little bit of beans in the tub I was eating from, so I put it on the floor for the dogs to eat; Bully picked up the whole container in his mouth and ran off with it to hog it to himself. What a pig!
>> We played with Idris for a bit, and he was so cute and kept licking my fingers when I poked him on the nose. And I fed him a couple of moth larvae; he loved it.
>> When Kevin and Gina dropped us off in town, Kevin called Lozz a gooch and I thought I was going to die, I was laughing so much.
>> In Debenhams, where we were surreptitiously squirting perfume on ourselves like a couple of cheapskates, we met the most amazing woman that worked at the Dior counter. She told us interesting facts about the perfumes (like: Hypnotic Poison contains amber, which has an addictive scent!) and then complimented the lip stain we were wearing, before giving each of us a Christian Dior ribbon, tying it around our wrists. They're red with 'Dior' printed on them and have two little charms hanging off them -- one charm is a C (for Christian) and the other is a D (for Dior) -- love it!! She was amazing, I loved her.
>> We walked past Elongated Bean in casual wear(!!) and I said, VERY loudly, "I'm in love with you!!" then I went all silly because I couldn't believe what I'd just done.

>> Pre-gig.. Lozz and I sat in Faringdon Park and drank a couple of cans of Monster to get the hyper going; I also had a nice chat on the phone with Lana, which helped the hyperness somewhat and also made her think I'm criminally insane. Which is always nice. Lana, I'm sorry. I was excited. I also shouted, "I like your bum!" at some man jogging past us.

So this great day was a prelude for a bloody fantastic night! Now I think I'll blog about last night's gig.... Prepare for lolz.

-- Kayleigh

Flyering Lolz

2010-10-12T16:19:00.000-07:00

So today about 39586358635630 flyers came through the post for me and for Lozz, and we've spent most of today trying to get rid of them all. I hope we've managed to convince some people to go to the gig tomorrow cause I feel like I've burst a blood vessel and both my lungs with all the laughing. Mullins decided that he wanted to help hand out flyers, even though he's not going to the gig, and he tried to hand them to old people and started shoving them in peoples' lockers. I was aggressively putting them into peoples' hands, Lozz and I made some new friends through flyering, I slapped Gorgeous Bill with a stack of flyers when he said he didn't want more (we'd already made him take about 1000), and we made Lovely Scene Kid take more as well. We downright threatened Jordyn and some complete strangers. Oh my God, it was a frenzy and it was HILARIOUS. Tomorrow we're gonna throw a load of flyers out of the car window as we're driving. I just hope TLD don't drive down the same road we do that on and see all their flyers hanging out on the tarmac XD

I'm far too excited. Chris called me awesome and Dan called me a star. I've been promised drinks. I feel extremely loved. And I hurt from laughter remembering how stupidly we've acted today. Ohhhhh :')

-- Kayleigh

Squishy Eating Broccoli

2010-10-10T13:25:00.000-07:00

Awwwww.

Shawty Had Them Apple Bottom Jeans

2010-10-09T14:00:00.000-07:00

So, after getting very angry yesterday morning (see previous post XD), the day got a bit better. In Media, this is all I did (crappily transformed picture of a duck on a picture of a harbour and hastily history brushed where I'd lassoed it wrong XD); for no reason, it made me laugh hysterically because it's so shite. After Media, we were people-watching as per, and we saw Nice Hat. Freya shouted, "Nice Hat!! TAKE IT OFF!! Imagine if he took it off and he had, like, another head--" then she turned to me with a look of horror and said, "VOLDEMORT!!" in such a panicked voice that she reduced me to hysterics. I saw Danny going up the stairs and shouted, "GAY BOY!!" -- I found it really funny when turned around. I said, "Shawty had them Apple Bottom jeans." and Steve said, "Boots with the fur?" so I nodded and said, "The whole club was looking at her." in a really insightful voice.
My lessons after the break were fucking boring but before Psychology I GOT A MAN-NOD AND 'AIGHT?' OFF BUFF KIERAN! OH MY ACTUAL GOD, FAMILIARITY WITH HOTNESS. Ohhh :')
After college, two cute guys came and plonked themselves on the bench next to me (I was sat out front waiting for Lozz and Gina to come and pick me up); I was awkward enough, then one of them left and his mate was STILL sat near me. I felt like I should say something cause we were just sat there, so I texted Lana for help. She told me to say "Nice face; where did you buy it?" and I laughed ALOUD. Cringe!! Fortunately, he just looked at me and did a little smile, so I'm hoping he found it cute that I was apparently insane and laughing at nothing.
Lozz and I walked past 12Bar on our way to someone's house and saw all the Light Divided posters in the windows; we went into transports of excitement, and I am still vaaaaair excited for Wednesday!! It's gonna be so hilarious, especially if we make Dave keep his promise about coming out to a gay bar with us XD As we walked away from 12Bar, we were walking past a long line of traffic; a hot Chav leaned out of the back of a taxi and shouted, "Oy oy!" at us; we looked over and he added, "I LOVE YOU!!" we were like, "Thanks?" It was BRILLIANT. And we saw a greyhound outside a shop; he was BEAUTIFUL! He had these massive eyes and his fur looked like tiger fur. His name was JD and he was lovely!! I wanted to steal him away!!
In the car, Lozz, Gina and I burst into a rendition of 'Gold' by Spandeau Ballet, for no reason. Then while we were playing BANG (our car game: when you drive past people walking outside you can shout either 'BANG', 'BOO' or 'SAFE'), Dolly Parton came on. So we were singing that and yelling, "SAFE!" at everyone we drove past. Ohhh. I put my thumbs up at some executive guy when we were stopped at traffic lights, and he put his thumbs up back, then drove off grinning! I said, "I made his night." And then OUR night was made cause the Bee Gees' 'Staying Alive' came on!! Yesssssss!! We sang along at the tops of our voices, with exaggerated disco dancing. Pure excellence.

-- Kayleigh

Bitter Old Hag

2010-10-08T11:15:00.000-07:00

So EMA didn't pay me and I had such a horrible bus ride this morning (going all the way out to Walmart before college to get Gus a present -- he better fucking appreciate it!!) that -- by the time I got to college -- I was in such a bad mood that I was actively trying to kick people in the shins as I walked past them XD

"Cause Kayleigh said so!"

2010-10-07T17:24:00.000-07:00

On the way to college this morning, I saw Stuck In The 90s AND Lozz's Favourite Greb. So that was a.. Horrific start to the day. But it was remedied when I got a man nod off the Cutest Scene Kid In The World.
In Geoggers I chatted to 30 Days Of Night, and I will from now on call her by her name cause she's actually really nice and we had loooooads in common, even if she does remind me of one of the vampires of 30 Days Of Night XD Chav Jack butted into our conversation to remind me that I once threw my shoes at him last year. I told him to shut up and called him a little shit. He retaliated by pretending to trip me up after the lesson. And in A2 Psychology we learned about a theorist called Hoffman; I died happy.
In the break, we nicknamed a new guy: He Has To Take His Clothes Off. He was GORGEOUS. We (by we, I mean me, Freya, Lozz and Mullins, who suddenly came over all gay -- that's how hot this guy was) were all sat there shouting, "BUFF!" and "BARE PENG!!" at him. Good stuff.
AS Psychology was hilarious. Martha's lost her marbles; she can't seem to decide whether she loves me or hates me. On one hand, she was overly excitable about me getting questions right and laughed at a few of my 'witty' retorts. On the other hand, she kept having a go at me for whispering and glared at me a lot. I felt the burn. Unbalanced much!? Buff Kieran was on top form this lesson, and I loved it. He was naming some defence mechanisms (which we'd gone over in the A2 lesson) and sort of trailed off, saying he couldn't remember. I said, "COME ON!! We did this earlier!!" and he laughed. Ohhhh! :') We also exchanged IRONIC LOOKS(!!) when the Annoying Guy in our class kept talking shit. And he got angry at Sean for cheating in a memory test ("Omg, you didn't even get that one -- don't lie!!" Oh my lol. Sean made me laugh too cause Martha asked him why Freud's ideas are dated -- Sean said, "Cause they're old." Phish Food (who now nods at me every time he sees me) muttered, "Fuck sake." every time he was asked a question and unfortunately Lozz and I remembered the word 'vest' in the memory test because of Bean Jolliffe's terrifying burgundy vest. I said that cognitive psychology is simple and Lady GaGa agreed. Martha asked, "Why is it simple though?" and GaGa said, "Cause Kayleigh said so!" I was so proud! I felt like God!!
As I walked over to the bus stop after college, Lozz was wrapping a bandage around my face; she loved that I just carried on walking and my facial expression was completely blank. I don't react because these things seem normal to me, mmmk? And on the bus home, a douche with BO was sat behind me repeatedly kicking my seat. I said, "Stop fucking KICKING MY SEAT." and got appreciative laughs from the Chavs around me. Yessss!

And I literally just heard Mutti say, "I'm sweating like a dragon."

-- Kayleigh

"Oy, bus girl!!"

2010-10-06T19:30:00.000-07:00

Here's some bullet points about why today was excellent:

>> You remember me blogging about a boy that was throwing Hula Hoops down a guy's jacket on the bus? Well, I walked past him outside college today and heard someone shout, "Oy, bus girl!!" I turned around and Hula Hoops was grinning and pointing at me. I said, "Hi!" and waved. It was excellent.
>> We did some flyering for the Light Divided gig next week (ANYONE READING THIS THAT CAN GET TO SWINDON 12BAR BY 7:30PM NEXT WEDNESDAY, GOOO!! IT'S ONLY £4 A TICKET!!), and that was amusing cause we were sticking them on every notice board, anti-socially covering up other posters.
>> We we handing the flyers to people as well, which was good cause we had an excuse to talk to the Cutest Scene Kid In The World AND Gay In Grey. And there was also Lovely Scene Kid who had lush hair and said "I think I'm probably into the same music as you." whilst eyeing Lozz's Young Guns t-shirt and my Kill Hannah t-shirt. And we gave a flyer to Ashley and one of his greb mates said, "The Light Divided? How can you divide light?" I said, "I dunno, but they know how. Wash your hair." it was grand.
>> And Jonathan Gaskin looks lush with his natural hair colour :)

-- Kayleigh

"I'm not Egyptian!"

2010-10-05T21:03:00.000-07:00

Last night, Mutti was narrating everything she did. In song form.

Today, I had a blood test first thing -- I was sat there, chatting with the nurse about Psychology with fifty pints of blood in my lap.
I walked past the Cutest Scene Kid In The World and gave his 'girlfriend' a funny look; CSKITW looked like he was about to die laughing. I wish he had. I also had a glaring competition on the stairs with Scenie; for the record, I won.
When I got to Psychology, Phish Food nodded at me and 'aight'ed. EXCELLENT. The Psychology test went quite well, I was pretty happy with it, although -- after the lesson -- Buff Kieran walked past and I became speechless. Not to mention we saw Gay In Grey, corrr!! Freya made up a new nickname for someone -- Chin. He is a guy that has no existing chin, HILARIOUS. We rampaged up to the OLC where we started our nickname dictionary; soon enough we were in tears because it was so bloody funny. We also saw a guy and named him Skinny Mutton Chops -- guess why.
On the way in from outside, I got beeped at. I turned around and it was Gina in her car; Kevin was sat in the passenger seat, wearing a chrome-effect plastic mask in the style of a gorilla skull. I merely did a double-take and said, "Why?" because nothing he does surprises me anymore.
In Media, I just spent the lesson chatting to various members of The Light Divided about getting free merch, going to gay bars, and the gig next week. Well excited, I love those boys. And I threatened Laurence again cause I haven't done it for a while. My nose was itching and I complained cause it was driving me mental; Hana said, "Why don't you stick a pencil up your nose and give it a scratch?" I said, "I'm not Egyptian!" and Hana and Mo found it too funny. Then I broke Mo's computer by pressing loads of buttons.

When I was in the car with Vati, he told me a story about his friend making Chewbacca noises whilst driving a car and my dad was in the passenger seat flicking the overhead light on and off. Honestly, people wonder why I've come out so unbalanced.

-- Kayleigh